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This forum is for discussion of issues related to Mixed Orientation relationships only, that is when one partner is heterosexual (straight) and one is Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender or Questioning.
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1 | General Discussion » going forward » April 18, 2025 8:08 pm |
- Rob
- Replies: 2
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Happy easter.
Someone that would die for us. Unlike our spouses.
| Support » Where do I go from here? » March 27, 2025 7:35 am |
- Rob
- Replies: 21
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Yeah like Lily said...don't think its bad luck so much as we are kind empathetic people and gay in denial people seem to gravitate toward us. Add in a little bit of low self esteem in ourselves and we are perfect prey. Or, as my 20/20 analysis of my spouse.....my GX simple had a "broken moral core". To lie and not give 100% love, to be hurtful and cruel to someone you professed before God and family to love and cherish.. its a scary thing.
Also, I don't think they can take our kids away or we ever leave our kids.. I think our kids get a better, stronger, unabused parent that shows them how one is supposed to treat people they love (not by lying and cheating but
with stoic fierce loyalty).
| General Discussion » Witchcraft, Novels, and more!!! » March 27, 2025 7:21 am |
- Rob
- Replies: 60
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Held,
Sad, but not surprised, that per your thread title there is "more'. Always more.. horrible stuff. But at least you know what to expect and what she is all about.
I'm like 9 years divorced now and while it was difficult to go through I thank God everyday to not be married to plotting and scheming partner who had new schemes of hurt every day. There is a peace, a solace, a safety in knowing when you get up in the morning there is no one actively plotting to hurt you more.
Be stoic and consistent for your kids, plan your exit. When ready simply tell her its over. Sadly many of her problems will need to remain her problems and not your's to solve. Their are consequences to cheating in a marriage...this they know, and they do it anyway. There is a pomp and circumstance to divorcing/separating...its a formal conclusion...these spouses left us long ago.
Wishing you strength, courgage and Christianity (as opposed to witchcraft).
| Support » Cycling » March 26, 2025 8:32 am |
- Rob
- Replies: 16
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Jupiter1,
I think at some point we realize we cannot control or change our spouses..no more than we can control the tides and weather.
Their actions say all we need to know. I will say there are good people in the world with fierce genuine qualities.. but our spouses just aren't it.
Be kind to yourself and know that you tried.
| Support » Cycling » March 26, 2025 8:28 am |
- Rob
- Replies: 16
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Mariesmith,
Wow that's a wise kid you have.
I hid what tears I could from my kids..it wasn't something thru could solve..and they were nit as wise as your kid.
| Support » Where do I go from here? » March 26, 2025 8:25 am |
- Rob
- Replies: 21
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Good replies above...
Not your fault and don't try to solve problems she created. I spent too much time and stress trying to solve what my GX created...where would she live, where would the kids live etc.
Read the first aid kit. In time talk to a lawyer. Come up with what you want for the kids because these spousesdo not have the kids interest on mind. Be a stoic and fierce father...in time you can get through it.. small baby steps.
| Support » Hello group... » March 26, 2025 8:18 am |
- Rob
- Replies: 11
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My feeling is life is short. And things are relative. No one even if I married them and they turned gay me.. no one could hurt me as much as my GX.
Do you see any signs your new guy capable of your previous hurt? I wouldn't say being married brings anymore assurances of fierce loyalty and faithfulness after what we've been through...cant use marriage as a gauge. Talk of growing old together yeah.
Tell him your anxiety and take it a day at a time. It sounds like you found a good guy.
| Support » Divorcing....but they've chosen to open a daycare in our house. » February 26, 2025 7:52 am |
- Rob
- Replies: 4
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They want to live and work in your house for free?
I struggled with this as my cheating, non working, raging GX threw things at me.. how do I divorce without making her homeless? Why is this also my problem?
Please have the final financial arrangements clear in the divorce settlement. Most sell the house or one buys the other out. To me anything else was not divorce and a form of contact.
| Support » Intro to therapy? » February 5, 2025 7:12 am |
- Rob
- Replies: 13
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borogove
It sounds like you're doing all the right things. Please remember none of it is your fault.
50/50 here also..just remember she
..entitled to half a kid, half a dog. Half of the assets. She is also entitled to half of the debt.
If they are capable of cheating and plotting then they are quite capable of getting a job.
As far as therapist I went to a general family therapist...I don't think she specialized in anything.. what my therapist was, was a normal straight heterosexual female...which is what I needed at the time...just a normal person to talk to. (Then again anyone is more normal and moral than a cheating GX).
Wishing you fierce faith, strength and stoicism.
| Is He/She Gay » Gay Anxiety » February 4, 2025 11:53 pm |
- Rob
- Replies: 2
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Rawa,
If he has any morality and empathy you should be able to outright ask him. You shouldn't have to snoop.
You have every right to feel wary and he should understand and respect that.
An answer like "if you put a gun to head i wouldnt like guys" would be ideal. An flat answer like no with no eye contact would be worrysome. His phone should be an open book if he truly loves you.
I sincerely hope your not noticing red flags.