My husband loves trannies. Sorry if anyone finds the term offensive but I find that my husband being attracted to them offensive. When I discovered his internet history, it was nothing BUT trans porn. I was so hurt. I never knew. I also found various sex toys NEVER used with me. I found this huge anal dildo it had been used. I also found his toy cleaner that had shit on it. Penis pumps, vaginal masturbation toy, trans porn dvds hidden in our closet. I asked him how in the hell if he were straight could he see a penis and not be turned off by it. His answer was even more telling. I don't see them as men. They are women to me. They are beautiful and look like women. I said don't get it twisted. They ALL HAVE COCK AND BALLS WHICH MAKE THEM MEN NO MATTER HOW YOU WANT TO SPIN IT. IM NOT STUPID.

I have written about my experiences with my husband on here before. I have since taken a travel nurse position and am gone a lot so I don't feel like a totally useless human. I cannot do anything that would make me believe that my "transsexual attracted" husband would ever be attracted to me. EVER. We currently live as roommates and the sex is as non existing as it was 10 to 12 years ago. His mother died from cancer and the maladaptive behavior started, well, it started before I just didn't know it. I have stopped all questioning and pretty much any conversation about sex. It's futile. I guess that was the goal. I have had friends with benefits along the way and felt absolutely no guilt from it whatsoever. My husband treats me like a well loved sister. It's humiliating almost. He has denied every question of cheating (I know better). Being gay (something has never added up). I guess I'm at the point of complete and utter surrender and scared to damn death of being alone for the rest of my life. I have trust issues and self confidence issues. I've always had those. I think that's what made me an easy target. I've since bought a house in another state and have been thinking about just jumping and see where I land (figuratively speaking). Hell it can't be worse than it is now. Just so damn alone and do not want to die being someone's beard. I need to know how to go about this leaving so I can just get on with my life. Even if I did, I doubt I would be met with much resistance. He thinks everything is just great. I know he has to think that our relationship is not okay. Every time I say OUR marriage is not normal. He always compares it to everyone else's saying no one's marriage is great. I say, "I don't want to be like everyone else and nor do I care about everyone else. I only care about here and now, and us." He doesn't get it. He doesn't care. I have never officially left before either. I'm his second marriage. His first marriage was almost identical except his moth

My husband started completely shaving all of his hair from his pubic area. I told him it made me think of prepubescent and that hair is there for a reason. Well, I notice from his balls back are as smooth as a baby's ass. And no, there wasn't anything sexual going on for me to notice. Is he grooming the main area for action or???

Sean, I have asked him to "put out or get out " for lack of better words. I asked him if he was still attracted to me. I just get crickets from him. He just gets defensive. He recently got a prescription for ED. I told him that it doesn't work if you aren't interested. I have planned a trip to Turks and Caicos and I plan to just break the news that I'm leaving.  I do love him but at this point I'm not in love. Hes pushed me away far too many times and the gaslighting and emotional abuse is far too much for me to take anymore. I told him when two people live together and dont have sex....they're called roommates. I told him I dont want to be a roommate anymore. It's over. Hes kissing my ass a lot but no sex which is fine with me.

Sean, I don't remember what user name I had. The content described the use of transexual porn, the only porn, he viewed escalating to adult friend finder, and my space, and him having these open, oozing sores on his hands, arms, and groin area. Multiple cell phone calls to numbers that I have no idea to where or who. I have been told that straight men view transexual porn but I believe in his case, since it was the only type of porn, he could justify to himself since they "looked like women" it was okay. I have heard him talk in his sleep during this time that quote, "I hate sleeping with her. I like dick." He says he would never say this and called me a liar. Why in the world would I make this up??? He told me to get over it and stop beating a dead horse. He was just tired of hearing about the way he made me feel. Anyway. I hope that jars your memory.