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Support » Sexless marriage, but he cheats w/males and females » July 19, 2020 10:40 pm

Jasmin2020
Replies: 9

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I am fully aware of STD issues, so it probably is a good thing regarding a sexless marriage.  Just reading so many posts, and having some of you reply to me, as been about as enlightening as I could have hoped.  The very fact that my husband is secretive, and seeking sex outside of marriage...heck, instead of inside of marriage, is enough for me to have decided that I am exiting the marriage.   To me, his sexual orientation is totally irrelevant.  My guess is that he is bi, loves the adventure of "swingers", etc., and frankly, it turns my stomach.  That may not be the effect on any of you, but the sneaky, deceptive, lying to my face, ignoring my wants and needs is plenty reason enough to leave. I have confronted him in the past about our sex life, his secrecy, etc. and guess what?  He lied about everything...again..  Gee, surprise, surprise.  Remember that old song:  "I got along without ya, before I met ya, and I'm gonna get along without ya now..."  I will be fine.  Or not.   What I do know is that I will NOT be fine if I stay with him.    And that is all I need to know.

I have decided to quietly move out, little by little, get my financial ducks in a row, win an Academy Award for Best Actress over the next several weeks, and the day I leave will be a day when he is likely to be out of the house for awhile, and I am just going to leave a note wafting in the breeze.  "I have left.  I am not coming back.  You know why.  You just didn't know that I knew.  Don't contact me unless it is through your attorney."

Support » Sexless marriage, but he cheats w/males and females » July 19, 2020 5:55 pm

Jasmin2020
Replies: 9

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I am new to this forum.   I am in a 14-year marriage (second for both of us) and it has been sexless for years...his choice.  Now I find he seeks out threesomes on Craigslist, sometimes male to male with female observing, sometimes male/male/female.   What does anyone think is going on here?  It is all done in secret, and he doesn't know I know, and I am saying nothing until I decide whether to stay or go.  If he is bi or gay, I am leaving.  If he is straight, I will work on the marriage.  He is all gung-ho about us being married, but shows no physical affection to me at all.  Zero.   Says he has "low sex drive" due to one medication he is on...but then he is "trolling" for extra-marital action.  I was a mess yesterday when I found his email.  Today I am calm, but extremely pissed off.  I am playing it cool until I have more info.

Anyone who has any opinion on this, please, please share.  This is a whole new territory for me.
My first husband, and the father of my two adult children, was completely straight without doubt.

I think I know what you all will say to me, but I am ready to hear it

Thank you all so much.

Jasmin

Is He/She Gay » Confident he is gay but he won't admit it...not sure what to do » July 19, 2020 4:02 pm

Jasmin2020
Replies: 9

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Thanks for replying to my Is My Husband Gay? question.  It helped.  But I don't quite know how to "Post my own post" in order to get more replies.  I am new to this forum.  Can you help me with that technicality?  Many thanks.  Jasmin

Is He/She Gay » Confident he is gay but he won't admit it...not sure what to do » July 19, 2020 10:31 am

Jasmin2020
Replies: 9

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This is probably a really stupid question, but I am in a sexless marriage with a man who occasionally (and always secretly) seeks out male/male with female observing relationships.  He does not know I know this.
Does this mean that he is gay?  He goes on Craigslist to find local couples looking for a male partner to play.
Any advice? 

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