Of course this is about you as well! I think it’s one of the most difficult things in these situations: because you’re in a relationship with the other person, to an extent your own identity is reflected in and affected by the other persons identity. Of course, they are going on their own journey of discovery and exploration and you want to support that, but of course this is going to have great significance and relevance for you. I think an analogy would be, let’s imagine your partner decided they suddenly wanted to live in a completely different country. If you’re going to stay in the relationship with them, of course that is going to be relevant to you! I know what was completely essential for me in navigating my partners transition was frequent, ongoing conversations about negotiating and collaborating over these issues together. Being really clear and honest with each other about how are you each feel and what you both want is so important. Neither persons point of view is more important than the other's; not if you’re in an equal relationship together. Being a good ally and supporting your partner is great; but this is your relationship as well. It doesn’t mean you get to put demands or force them to do or not do things either , but I think with any other relationship issue both of you have to have a say in what the agreement, arrangements and ultimate outcome is going to be and you have to be able to ask the question whether that works for you as well as them. Wishing you both all the best of luck
Last edited by MimiCat (April 6, 2022 5:02 pm)
