OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / "The Bachelor" Announces He Is Gay

**Posted by EmpathyStarved** April 16, 2021 10:20 am

Victo wrote:
isn’t there something awfully performative and disingenuous about his personality?

THIS! I think back on my 12 year marriage and how much I used to admire my husband's big personality. He was charming and engaging and always the center of attention in any room. I used to think he was so brave. But now that I know the truth I no longer admire him at all, because it was all an act. A performance. A carefully crafted lie to hide his true self and shore up the walls of his closet.

**Posted by Victo** April 20, 2021 11:14 pm

Good find, Maria. I think I will be signing this one.

**Posted by Victo** April 21, 2021 3:23 pm

She didn’t know. Of course she didn’t. He would have had to had integrity for her to know the truth.

https://people.com/tv/bachelor-colton-underwood-ex-cassie-randolph-didnt-know-he-was-gay-source/

**Posted by Victo** April 23, 2021 9:49 pm

This article shows screenshots of the texts he sent her as well as photos of the tracking device he placed on her car. It really hits home how messed up his behavior was.

His need to control... the way he contacts her friends and family in order to stay in control of the narrative. It is quite disturbing.

GID narcissist. It seems to be an actual personality type.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-9504307/Cassie-Randolph-speaks-Bachelor-ex-Colton-Underwood-came-apologized-bad-choices.html

**Posted by LastingEffect** April 26, 2021 7:44 pm

OMG it's like he has "the handbook" for the GID. You know what's so sad, him going on that show was more than a lapse in judgment. It was a concerted effort on his part to deceive all those women, the people working on the show and the public watching, ending up with him essentially abusing the person he "chose" and gaslighting her.

**Posted by clintonia** May 2, 2021 11:49 pm

LastingEffect wrote:
THEY ARE LIARS WHO LIE TO MULTIPLE PEOPLE OVER PERIODS OF YEARS. I haven't dated or wanted to date since and I will not take a chance on going through that again.... In my case, you've caused permanent damage.

Agree; it's *always* (early teens through early 30s) affected my thinking about a relationship or dating (and more recently, people's views generally) and I don't see a "getting over it". Trauma: you can move forward, but it markedly affects you, the scar remains, and triggers.

I just watched the video posted on this Bachelor. He reminds me a lot of the guy I knew and I'm still thoroughly not okay. How is this celebratory and he to be embraced?

Last edited by clintonia (May 3, 2021 12:28 am)