OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / February 22, 2020

**Posted by StraightSpouse1979** February 22, 2020 4:01 pm

So, today the one thing that is prevelent on my mind is my daughter's read across America week at her kindergarden school. The notice came home in her folder and i opened it first and held it captive. Signed myself up and didnt even tell her dad. Is that wrong? I dont want him there reading to her class in his current outward appearance. I dont trust he wont go full makeup and tight clothing and just wear his silver hoops and be inappropriately dressed for that occasion. Even in somewhat non insane outfit choices he still looks like a giant drag queen and I dont want him to read to her class. I know he is her dad and has a right to have this opportunity but i can only protect her so much because there is not much I can control but this i can control. Does that make me horrible?

**Posted by Abby** February 22, 2020 4:24 pm

Nope. Your daughter is in a kindergarten class with many other pupils, some of whose parents may not yet have discussed transgendered people with them. These parents choose whether or not to take their child to a library's "Drag Queen" reading events but it would be unfair to for your husband to spring this on the teacher, these others children - and your daughter. Since he seems to be thinking only of himself from what you have written previously someone has to be the responsible adult.

That said, since he is not going to stop feminizing his appearance so at some point you are going to have to have "the talk" with her so that she can figure out how she feels about this and how she wants to address it with her friends.

**Posted by Abby** February 22, 2020 4:25 pm

Delete that misplaced "to" please.

**Posted by Rob** February 23, 2020 3:18 pm

Definitely dont let him go to her school like that. You did the correct thing.

My GX has/had the sick advantage that she and her girlfriend could appear at school events as two friends.

It boggles my mind that he would not care what he looks like for his daughter. That they will hurt their own kids. Your daughter needs you now more than ever.

**Posted by OutofHisCloset** February 23, 2020 6:45 pm

MJM,
And what is her next move to be when he doesn't adhere to her boundary? Setting a boundary doesn't guarantee the other person will respect it. Her husband has shown (as have many of our husbands who are feminizing) time and time again that he will do whatever he wants whenever he wants no matter the effects on his wife and his daughter. SS1979 keeps wanting him to acknowledge the pain he is causing or the position he is putting her in and he DOES NOT CARE. He has not and never will take either SS1979 or their daughter into account.

Last edited by OutofHisCloset (February 23, 2020 6:45 pm)