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- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: WHAT DO I DO
Helpme25 wrote:
..... sometimes I feel she makes me feel like I made my bed now lye in it
Well Helpme... I think you should sit down with her and open your heart, admit to her she was right about this man and ask for her advice.
You said it was your mother who would be with you when the baby is born? No mother does that and doesn't care about their daughter and grandchild. Maybe you both have doubts about the reaction you'll get from each other. One of you has to make the first move. You saying "Mum you were right" is all you need to start a conversation with her.
*hugs
KIA KAHA
- Helpme25
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Re: WHAT DO I DO
..... sometimes I feel she makes me feel like I made my bed now lye in it
Well Helpme... I think you should sit down with her and open your heart, admit to her she was right about this man and ask for her advice.
You said it was your mother who would be with you when the baby is born? No mother does that and doesn't care about their daughter and grandchild. Maybe you both have doubts about the reaction you'll get from each other. One of you has to make the first move. You saying "Mum you were right" is all you need to start a conversation with her.
She lives around 1200 miles from me I will be calling her today and telling her what I found Any suggestions on what I should ask for her to help me with?
*hugs
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Thread Starter- Helpme25
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Re: WHAT DO I DO
Maybe some family counseling for you and your mother? A third party could help both of you move beyond this past and face the future together. She is the children's grandmother as well as your mother and will want the best for all of you. As I see it, she could become a tremendous help to you.
She lives 1200 miles from me so we can’t do counseling together however I am gonna talk to her today any suggestions on what I should ask her to help me with
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Thread Starter- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: WHAT DO I DO
...She lives around 1200 miles from me I will be calling her today and telling her what I found Any suggestions on what I should ask for her to help me with? ..
Just let the conversation flow naturally.
"What can I do... Where do I start?" sounds like a good opening
Elle
KIA KAHA
- Helpme25
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Re: WHAT DO I DO
...She lives around 1200 miles from me I will be calling her today and telling her what I found Any suggestions on what I should ask for her to help me with? ..
Just let the conversation flow naturally.
"What can I do... Where do I start?" sounds like a good opening
Elle
I spoke to her, she told me to prepare myself with $ and come home (to my parents)
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Thread Starter- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: WHAT DO I DO
I spoke to her, she told me to prepare myself with $ and come home (to my parents)
How do you feel about that? Sounds like she's offering you somewhere to fall, which is what you need. Space away from your husband... To think about things.
What exactly did she mean "prepare yourself with $$"..?
Elle
KIA KAHA
- Helpme25
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Re: WHAT DO I DO
I spoke to her, she told me to prepare myself with $ and come home (to my parents)
How do you feel about that? Sounds like she's offering you somewhere to fall, which is what you need. Space away from your husband... To think about things.
What exactly did she mean "prepare yourself with $$"..?
Elle
Just to have money to go home with
She is telling me I can’t get my own house and that I half to live with her if I do leave and of course I’m a grown woman about to be a mother of 2 I can do what I want but it still stresses me out that she isn’t allowing me to do what I need for myself my mom has ways that I can’t live with I can’t go back and stay with her forever In one house I need my space.
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Thread Starter- Soaplife
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Re: WHAT DO I DO
HelpMe could you manage living with your mother for a couple of years until your life is back on track? Have your baby, get divorced, find a job ... maybe you would be able to rent a place near her when you find a job, so you can have your own space and she can still help you?
It is amazing how quickly things can change for the better if you just can find some support and a safe place to land for a while like your mum is offering.
Good luck, its such a hard time you are going through.
- winnie340
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Re: WHAT DO I DO
It is so earth shattering to find the unthinkable... I will never forget the day I found "gay" evidence on the computer. I felt like I was coming out of my body... The shock was powerful, he might as well had bodies buried in the back yard.. that's how shocked I was.... The one thing I don't agree with is the number of posts I have read. Why do we feel like we are criminals for snooping? Why should there be any privacy in a marriage??? If you have nothing to hide, why can't your partner see every part of your life? Secrets in a marriage, as we all know, are detrimental to a relationship.. There should be no secrets, and if that is the case you wouldn't be "snooping" in the first place... If you find yourself snooping.. don't feel bad for invading someones privacy.. it's not just someone, it is your intimate partner in life.. Snooping equals something is wrong and you need to validate your intuition..
- Helpme25
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Re: WHAT DO I DO
It is so earth shattering to find the unthinkable... I will never forget the day I found "gay" evidence on the computer. I felt like I was coming out of my body... The shock was powerful, he might as well had bodies buried in the back yard.. that's how shocked I was.... The one thing I don't agree with is the number of posts I have read. Why do we feel like we are criminals for snooping? Why should there be any privacy in a marriage??? If you have nothing to hide, why can't your partner see every part of your life? Secrets in a marriage, as we all know, are detrimental to a relationship.. There should be no secrets, and if that is the case you wouldn't be "snooping" in the first place... If you find yourself snooping.. don't feel bad for invading someones privacy.. it's not just someone, it is your intimate partner in life.. Snooping equals something is wrong and you need to validate your intuition..
It’s insane what we go through
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Thread Starter