OurPath Open Forum
This forum is for discussion of issues related to Mixed Orientation relationships only, that is when one partner is heterosexual (straight) and one is Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender or Questioning.
If this does not apply to your topic, please find another forum.
* Opinions posted here, including that of the Administrator, are the poster's own and do not necessarily reflect the views or policies of OurPath.
* As a peer-to-peer network, any advice given is that of a peer, based on personal experience, and should not be considered professional in nature.
* Any discussion of LGBT related issues is acceptable provided it remains constructive and respectful of other viewpoints. Hateful, degrading, or prejudiced speech and/or personal attacks will not be tolerated.
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- Queenpin
- New member
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Re: Just call me crazy!
Last night my husbands family had a little birthday bbq for him and they invited two of his friends (a lesbian couple) who un-be-knowing to everyone else had hired a male stripper for him. My mom was there, she knows our story and the friend who hired the stripper knows what we are going through but everyone else just thinks he's "a weird one". It took everything I had not to break down crying. It's one thing to have the image of MY HUSBAND being with another person whether it be male or female....but to see it, even if "just for fun"...I just can't explain it. It was so absolutely disrespectful to me and I just can't fathom why his friend thought this was ok. I've always had a hard time expressing feelings but I just can't even organize my thoughts/feelings right now. I feel so numb. Thanks for listening.
- Daryl
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Re: Just call me crazy!
That's a very inappropriate thing to do without getting permission up front and then letting everyone else know in advance so that they could excuse themselves, if they wished.
“The future is unwritten.”
― Joe Strummer
- Rob
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Re: Just call me crazy!
Qp,
Yes the lesbian couple probably knew all about his same sex attraction.
I noticed that with my GXs girlfriend.
She has some gay siblings and they had so problem bringing my then wife into the fold and helping her hide things from me.
It speaks loads about the people they and less so about gays in general.
Get as far away from those people as you can..it may, sadly, includw staying away from his family if they seem to join in hurting you.
"For we walk by faith, not by sight .." 2Corinthians 5:7
- Upside
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Re: Just call me crazy!
Queenpin, you're a better person than me. If that had happened I would've absolutely lost it. How very hurtful and completely inappropriate.
There seems to be an obsession with "coming out" and "embracing your truth" in certain circles. I'm all for that. But the fact is another name for this is thoughtless hedonism at the expense of respect for those around.
If he was attracted to another woman they wouldn't have brought over a stripper. But now that he is gay, they feel it appropriate to do so? It's called tact.
Moreover, his reaction says volumes. If someone did that to me I'd curse them out, not participate, and apologize to those I love for their disgusting behavior. He sat there.
In my unsolicited unpinion, I would draw the line here. His friends are jerks. He lacks character and a backbone. Good riddance to them, they can enjoy life on their own. But I'm getting more 'old testament God' in my reaction to this offensive behavior by the day over here.
Wishing you happiness and strength!
- Soaplife
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Re: Just call me crazy!
Dear Queenpin, I am so sorry you are being treated so badly by people who are supposed to care for you. Your love and concern is wasted on these abusive nasty people. Your words about the female coworker and the old school boyfriend set off alarm bells ... I would be almost certain your partner is cheating on you at least with both of them. So get a test for STIs stat and stop having sex with him if you haven't already stopped. The male stripper hiring was indeed very cruel and totally disrespectful and insulting to you. It sounds like your best bet would be to get as far away as possible as soon as possible from these awful people.
They will only get worse. It hurts so much to leave, I know - but my best advice is RUN. Find someone who deserves your beautiful heart.