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This Open Forum is funded and administered by the Straight Spouse Network (SSN), a 501(c)(3) nonprofit that provides support to straight spouses and partners who have discovered that their spouse/partner isn’t straight. The results from SSN’s Annual Summer Donation Drive are in! Together with your help, SSN raised $16,381 during our annual Summer Donation Drive! That’s 109% of our goal! Learn more about how the funds will be utilized.

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Straight Spouse Network Open Forum

This Open Forum is funded and administered by the Straight Spouse Network (SSN), a 501(c)(3) nonprofit that provides support to straight spouses and partners who have discovered that their spouse/partner isn’t straight. Your donations allow us to provide important support and resources that straight spouses can't find anywhere else.


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March 6, 2021 10:26 pm  #1


What are the odds?

So...I got new neighbors this week, a couple in their early 30s.  Yesterday they were out working in their back garden when I was out in mine, so I introduced myself.  In the course of our conversation I said I'd moved in three years ago after a long marriage, and the woman thought I'd been widowed, so I said, "Oh, no, I divorced.  My husband decided he wanted to be a woman."  To which she said her husband's father was in the process of transitioning.  He is, she said, eighteen months into his "transition," and her in-laws had been married 32 years when her father-in-law had dropped his trans bomb, the same number as my ex and I had been when he dropped his, and eighteen months in was when I knew I needed to get out of the marriage.  She said it's not clear her in-laws' marriage will last. Then she said her in-laws will be visiting tomorrow, and she thought I should meet them.  If her mother-in-law could use an ear and some support I suppose I'd be willing to give it, although I'd be telling her to get out of the marriage ASAP.   But I don't want to even see the husband-wanna-be-woman, let alone meet him.  I find that I cannot stand the sight of middle-aged trans women.  Too triggering.

   I would never have thought I'd run into a situation like mine, at least not outside of a straight spouse meet up.  

Last edited by OutofHisCloset (March 6, 2021 10:33 pm)

 

March 6, 2021 10:56 pm  #2


Re: What are the odds?

OutofHisCloset wrote:

. .....,
   I would never have thought I'd run into a situation like mine, at least not outside of a straight spouse meet up.  

I'll be very interested to read the outcome of any meeting with her in-laws... Or the mother at least.
Did the husband of the new couple say anything?

Elle
 

Last edited by Ellexoh_nz (March 6, 2021 10:57 pm)


KIA KAHA                       
 

March 7, 2021 12:15 am  #3


Re: What are the odds?

The husband didn't say anything.  But if he seems amenable I might talk to him about his feelings about what his father is doing, because, as you may remember, my son does not know about my closeted ex.  

I did mention to the wife (of the young couple) that if her mother in law doesn't know about the straight spouse network she ought to visit.

     Thread Starter
 

March 7, 2021 1:04 pm  #4


Re: What are the odds?

OutofHisCloset wrote:

......I did mention to the wife (of the young couple) that if her mother in law doesn't know about the straight spouse network she ought to visit.

 

(As weird as it may sound) your account.....new neighbours, with a mother-in-law whose husband is transitioning....  makes me feel acknowledged. I don't know you (except on the forum), but you spoke your truth and I don't know your neighbour and the daughter-in-law felt she could speak hers.
A conversation about the Mindfuck out there in the world..!! 
 


KIA KAHA                       
 

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