My other question is, should I tell the soon to be in laws? The mother already called me and told me that I should see therapist because she wants the wedding to go off without a hitch. And that was after I made the simple request to be kept away from him at the wedding i.e. don't expect me to sit at the same table during or after the wedding because I want NO CONTACT with him at any point.That was my only comment to her. The truth is,  I literally become sick when I'm in the same area, I need to vomit  [and have] and my whole body shakes uncontrollably. IT's all terribly upsetting!

In my humble opinion, your children have the right of first knowledge on this topic. It's their mother, their father. The future in-laws I would leave in the consideration of my daughter. It is going to be her mother in-law. I would pose the question to her after informing her of where you stand and why, if she would like to convey the situation to in-laws, or would she be more comfortable with you doing it.

She's getting married, mom. She's an adult soon to have children of her own. Were I you, I would bring her in and include her as an adult in all ways.

wasn't referring to you Lyonene in my comments and I apologize for the confusion

No worries, Sean, thank you.

may as ask how you know about this stuff? Because when I came across forced fem I had to read it over and over to even grasp it!

Duped, it's a very long story. The shortest version I can give you is - I reside in a liberal west coast state. My state has gone round the bend with this gender bs. Public bathroom laws, title ix, indoctrination in public schools, dressing rooms in stores, locker rooms in excercise facilities, etc. Women and children here have had to deal numerous incidences both criminal and threatening.

We have here in my state a man in prison convicted of multiple murders of women right now claiming that he is innocent because he is now not the man that committed these murders due to becoming a MtT.
http://crimefeed.com/2016/10/douglas-didnt-stop-donna-stopped-it-the-trial-of-donna-perry-asks-an-unusual-question-can-gender-reassignment-surgery-really-stop-a-serial-killer-from-hunting/ We also have convicted rapists acting as very vocal trans activists. http://notcisjustwoman.tumblr.com/post/97514127434/jonathan-adrian-wolf-rapes-deaf-woman-changes
In Olympia a MtT was harrassing a girls swim team. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2227562/Colleen-Francis-Outrage-transgendered-woman-permitted-use-college-womens-locker-room-exposing-himself.html Their answer to this was to violate the girl's title ix rights and move them to a locker room the size of a bathroom. "Colleen Francis" was quick to pull down all his online sexual activity when this went public, but not quick enough. https://gendertrender.wordpress.com/2012/10/07/olympia-wa-school-officials-state-gender-identity-provision-overrides-title-ix-equality-for-girls-swim-teams/

You get the idea.

If people understood what was going on, really going on, the popularity supporting this trend would come to an en

although I do hope we can keep our exchanges civil and secular.

Was there something not civil or religious in what I said? I'm not seeing nor understanding what prompts this statement. If I'm missing it, please advise, as I would gladly clear up any confusion.

Yesterday was performance day. It was amazing. He should apply to play Hamlet in local theater. His drama is so thick it's tangible.

I was treated to a fest of waterworks, passionate pleas, self hatred, and avowals of how "broken" he's been. This went on for hours. By the end I was just exhausted from listening.

His self esteem is shit and has always been shit. He's never thought of himself as "a man" but always something lesser. He's always felt like a coward, "a pussy" (his words). His father made his life hell. His mother is a blundering idiot. He got molested at first, but was such a lonely rejected child, he began to "enjoy" the attention because it was the only attention he was getting. He found porn at such an early age, it warped his development. At first he stayed away from anything "gay" (ages 9 to 12) his interest was in females. Trans porn at age 12 was just freaky to him "not gay". He has a penis fixation because he has been insecure about his penis since childhood. He always viewed "big cock" as "manly", something he is not and something he physically doesn't have. (I'll chime in here in this tirade of things he said to input that his penis size is completely normal.) He is a compulsive porn user and most often triggered by boredom or stress. His compulsive porn use has cost him jobs verifying the problem nature of it. He's never thought of himself as gay because he retained a real world attraction to women (oogling/public objectifying). His craigslist cruising lasted 1 week and was merely him looking at ads, nothing ever came of it, he was extremely dissatisfied with all he saw. Blah, blah, blah...ad nauseam, ad infinitum.

I sat on the couch listening to this verbal exorcism for as long as I could, then got tired, got up and went to bed, leaving him and his tear-stained bs in the livingroom.

The entire time, all my inner brain dialog was saying to me was, wow, here I am the victim of a huge fraud that has ruined my life and the life of my 2 year

He's saying that because to him, if he would have done that, that would have made him gay.  So since that's his boundary, he figures it's everyone else's, too.  So he'll just tell you he never crossed that line, so that you then think he's not *really* gay.

Dead on, Kel. He's saying it's ALL just a porn thing because nothing was ever acted upon. That seems to be his reassurance to himself, and now me. Somehow, he believes keeping it all in the realm of fantasy and masturbation means not gay.

I flat out asked him - what in the hell do you think it all means?! Didn't it tell you what you needed to know about yourself? You've been getting off to dudes since you were a kid! He says, "I always thought it was just porn. It means nothing. They put big cock in all videos, straight videos, does that mean straight guys want big cock? If not, then why do it? Why have the money shot in all videos? It's what men want to see."

Great post, Kel, thank you so much!