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General Discussion » Needing a referral » Today 4:01 pm

Abby
Replies: 3

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Here is a place you may wish to contact:

https://www.floridabar.org/public/lrs/

The letters "lrs" stand for "Lawyer Referral Service".

General Discussion » Needing a referral » Today 3:36 pm

phoenix
Replies: 3

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I put out a feeler for you through a SSN contact.   The SSN itself doesn't make referrals, but our members and friends can absolutely do that.  So I'm hoping this person I reached out to can help. 
 

General Discussion » Needing a referral » Today 3:23 pm

Rob
Replies: 3

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Sorry I'm not in that area.
If the lawyer will not give you a free consultation then you do no want them.    Sadly I think you need to see them in person rather than email....tell them your story but try to keep a level head and pick their brain for information.    I will say even the most empathetic lawyer will make a bad therapist as they bill so much per hour. 

Yes, I had a couple that were very cold and dismissive.   Dont give up. 

General Discussion » Needing a referral » Today 3:17 pm

Roo
Replies: 3

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Hi all! I have tried to contact several lawyers (via email) and after explaining my situation, I almost felt as if I was blown off. A couple even said when they get $ up front, then they will discuss. So, I basically shut down and decided to forget about the situation. I know things are not going to change. If anyone lives in the Central Florida area and can suggest an attorney or two I would greatly appreciate it. 

Support » GIDH asking to stay together. » Today 3:17 pm

Rob
Replies: 13

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walk,

Yeah there comes a point when confronting them with the evidence is academic. The lies we experience when we know
the truth show us so much more... how futile confrontations are, how untrustworthy they are, what a low opinion they have
of us.

From the other side I can tell you its a good feeling not to come home to lies and covert activities. I surround myself with people
now that say what they mean and mean what they say..they have no secret agendas. Its like black and white....white now
is my life where a "good morning" is sincere and contains no hidden meaning or malice.

Support » Separation/divorce - Emotional » Today 3:14 pm

Clif
Replies: 11

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I wanted to remain friends but she and her new wife moved across the country. And... Now that I am looking at retirement, the fact that she walked away with half of 27 years of my pension has made me angry. I was the one out working in the blazing heat or freezing cold. I should be able to share my pension with the wife I will retire with. We are not friends.

Support » GIDH asking to stay together. » Today 3:14 pm

jkc1214
Replies: 13

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phoenix wrote:

OOHC - Dec 9th was my divorce date as well.  2 years ago. 

jkc - the fact that he tried to force you to say anything tells me a lot about his narcissism.  He is clearly scared to admit that he is gay.  He wants the world to think he's a happily married straight person and he's trying to manipulate you into remaining his beard.  

You know his inner desire is to stay in the closet.  You know he's manipulative and controlling.  So you should know what to expect from him in the months to come as you take control of your life and move forward. 

We are here for you each step of the way!

The problem for me is that he's not controlling and he's not a narcissist. If he was, I'd have no problem just telling him where to go. I've already gotten away from one before, learned all the lessons on how to get away. Never dealing with that crap again. My husband is just lost and in such denial that he really believes our crappy  marriage is ok. He doesn't see that he or I should want more from life and from a relationship. He really believes it when he says I am his whole world. I feel badly that he's hurting but I still have to get my life back. I know he didn't do this to me out of spite, I know he really thought it would work out, he thought I would make him happy. But he doesn't make me happy as a husband. I think we could be great co parents and dare I even hope, friends again someday. But this part where he wants to hang on just makes me feel so badly inside, but not enough to stay married to him.

Support » GIDH asking to stay together. » Today 3:07 pm

jkc1214
Replies: 13

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Mimi wrote:

JKC

I’m in the same situation as you right now. All of a sudden it’s my fault that our marriage might end. I’m the one who’s not trying enough and is giving up too easily. I’m hallucinating and these are all only assumptions. GID H thinks if we just continue our normal lives and “work” on our marriage we can “fix” our relationship.
Phoenix pointed out something that I’m realizing too. My GIDH also does narcissistic things like telling me that maybe I need to work on myself too to see how I can love him more!!

I should have addressed this in my last post. I know just how that feels. My ex boyfriend, from before I met my husband, was this same way. It was always, always, always about what I could do to salvage the relationship, no matter what horrible thing he was doing. Thankfully, I am not dealing with this attitude, just an extreme case of denial on my husband's part. 

Sending you support  and strength...it's not easy to get away from a narcissist. I did it, so it can be done.
 

Support » GIDH asking to stay together. » Today 3:04 pm

Abby
Replies: 13

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When your spouse does not want a divorce mediation - in my humble opinion - is a waste of time. Better to let the negotiations be done by an attorney representing YOU who will focus on the facts and the law. You get one shot at getting this right and he or she will stick of the matters at hand and not by swayed by whatever tears and pleas your spouse may display.

It is worth the money to know that you did all that you could to get what you are entitled to. Think of the cost as an investment in your financial future.

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