OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / Have your partners seen this forum?

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** **Online!** August 6, 2017 10:03 pm

How many of you SS's have made your wife, husband, partners sit down and read the SSN Forum?

And what was their reaction?

**Posted by Abby** August 7, 2017 5:25 am

I did not discover the forum - at its previous site - until my husband came out and was in the process of leaving. I have never told him about it or tried to get him to view it: this was my safe place and I post to it now to help others who are struggling to find clarity going forward.

**Posted by Rob** August 7, 2017 6:28 am

Show them a support site for us...for what purpose?
I can assure you for every hurt or grievance here my ex has a contrary point of view.. ie she is really the victim and we are all horrible people.

**Posted by Dee** August 7, 2017 7:06 am

Agree with Abby and Rob, never. It was my safe place.

**Posted by Duped** August 7, 2017 7:07 am

Deleted

Last edited by Duped (November 11, 2019 3:24 pm)

**Posted by Dee** August 7, 2017 7:20 am

Furthermore, if they had an ounce of courage or compassion, we wouldn't be here in the first place.

**Posted by phoenix** August 7, 2017 8:50 am

Our partner's are selfish.. period.

While a kind and compassionate person might change their behavior after having their eyes open to the pain they are causing.. our spouses are not those people.

Showing them this forum would not help a thing.. It would only remove the safety and anonymity we have here.

**Posted by lily** August 7, 2017 10:39 am

well, Ellexoh - there you go, you've just served us up to your husband. I think you must want to stay married real bad. Only you're hurting real bad and you know what a lot of people do who stay married? they take anti-depressants to cope. I don't recommend it but if you want to stay in your marriage then taking drugs will help.

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** **Online!** August 7, 2017 1:45 pm

To qualify the title of this thread. It is simply a question I ask.
While my partner knows of this site....I haven't shown it to him
nor has he asked to read it

**Posted by Daryl** August 7, 2017 2:45 pm

I have a feeling most of our spouses wouldn't read this forum. If they did, the very closeted would counter with either - that's not me, I'm not gay, I didn't do that or try to convince us that the rest of us "evil" people here are just trying to wreck someone else''s marriage because our own failed, not true of course. We have had a few non-straight spouses here over the years but, if I recall correctly, it was post-disclosure and after they did a lot of processing and coming to terms with their actions. Their contributions have been helpful as they are able to use their own experience to bring some clarity to the actions that some of our spouses do.

As a general reminder to everyone here, don't forget that this is a public board and anyone can read it without registering. It is also linked from the main SSN website. Never post anything too identifiable about yourself unless you're OK with that info being out there. Peace!