Lily,
I can identify. The man I conjured up in my mind never did exist. He's always been this scumbag who took great pleasure hurting me. The day we separated he amped it up to the moon trying everything he could to annoy or hurt me. He even asked me to wash his clothes so that he didn't have to the afternoon the truck was being loaded. We share a business so initially we had to speak and we used FaceTime to do it on several occasions. It took me a minute to realize he was taking a crap while we were talking business over FT! I watched him wipe and flush weeks after we we had split and he did it just to annoy me. Petty but he's also capable of much more. Anything to show me he can do whatever he wants and what I think is too damn bad. Mine acts like an insolent teenage boy past TGT with his 70 year old male sweetheart. He's thirsty to get back at me for throwing him out and ending his nice little ride.
He hasn't figured out I don't care what he does as long as he's not in my life.
lily wrote:
Hi cp,
I was 19 when I met my ex and 57 when I worked out he was gay. then I discovered he was nothing like I thought he was. he really was that malicious gnome at the bottom of the garden I kept dreaming about.
when we started the process of separation he went into overdrive, looking for any and every opportunity to hurt my feelings, turn people against me, lying to them shamelessly and I kept quiet because I was scared.
It's not his story - he's made it yours, he's made it your children's. My recommendation is the friends and family you rely on, tell them. tell them asap.
sorry. just needed to say that. wishing you all the best. you will be okay the anger helps to get things done and doesn't change you, you will stay the same loving person through it all.
Last edited by Judy (December 23, 2016 4:45 am)
