He now says he's gay/bi and has known his whole life.  He choose me for a normal life.  But the last few years, he's been trying to make me think we could fix everything.  He wanted to do counseling.  He wanted to move, far.  He wanted less of my parents in our life.  He wanted less of his family.  Neither were there that much.  My mother was at home childcare during those years, but didn't live with us, I worked full time.  He kept pointing out things that were wrong with me.  My crocheting at night took away from our together time.  It made me seem distracted.   My work was a problem.  He even blamed my ppd once. 

Why did he keep trying to get me to make huge changes?

I would so mad right now if I were living in another state far away from everything I knew when he told me this.