Anon2222 wrote:
I appreciate the apology, and I know you meant well. It just gets tiring sometimes to have people view it as some sort of personal flaw that I just "can't get over it".....
Well I never said it was a personal flaw, you did. And I see myself, all of us actually, as helping you 'get there' so in the end you can get over it all by yourself.
It took me 25 years to feel something wasn't quite right in my r'ship, another 10 to fall out of what I thought was love and the last 3 to gather the courage to start the separation process. Through it all the only person who really truly knows how this is affecting me is me, and every time something knocks me back or turns my stomach the only person I have to push me through it is me. So telling myself I have to be stronger is what I do, through fear of failure, through fear Crohns will rear it's nasty head and make me sick with stress. Every time I falter I take a deep breath and tell myself "pull your socks up, nobody else is driving this, stop feeling sorry for yourself" because I'm afraid I'll fail at the very thing I've never had to do. Be by myself. I just naturally thought this approach might work
for you too.
That's how I do it. Kind of a tough love. Because, in the end, when everybody goes back to their lives....
I'm all I've got.
E
