OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / I think he is in the closet

**Posted by adel1827** October 18, 2016 7:34 pm

Will post.

Last edited by adel1827 (December 26, 2016 9:36 pm)

**Posted by Judy** October 19, 2016 5:53 am

I wonder why I did as well. 46 years being treated awful. I really wanted to find out why I did it. When I brought this up in therapy, she said don't worry about why you stayed with him so long. You learned a great deal about yourself and just move on ahead to solid ground. There are such similarities in our stories. And more and more sign into our group daily. It's sad.

Billie wrote:
Adel, I don't see anything in your post that indicates anything good between you. I'm stunned that you hung in there as long as you did. Thank God you finally saw the light and got out of there. I hope you are able to eventually figure out why you put up with such awful "partnering" for so long. Congrats on getting the h*ll away from that guy. And I don't think it matters much at this point if he's gay or not; he's a nightmare, reason enough for you to "run like your hair is on fire," as another member on here puts it.

**Posted by adel1827 reply** October 19, 2016 5:15 pm

Believe it or not, I'm a mental health professional. I believe that one of the reasons I stayed is because I was facing a lot of opposition from my child's father. I really wanted to make this relationship work to prove him wrong. On the other hand, it felt good to have some company after so many years by myself. I also think that because of my profession, I have developed a lot of empathy. I always try to understand and put myself on other people's shoes. So, I gave him the benefit of the doubt. It really does not bother me that he may be gay. What bothers me is the lies. I find the use of another human being inexcusable.

**Posted by feelingoverwelmed** October 23, 2016 10:50 pm

I think you where right to walk away. My husband has been doing this in our marriage and it hasn't improved. We paid for him to go to Sante for sexual addiction and that was a big waste of money.