OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / First date after finding out.

**Posted by Josephine** November 3, 2023 3:13 pm

I have decided to go full steam ahead with my life. I figure I gave my husband 37 years and that is enough. I was ready to start dating before I found out he was gay, so even though it has only been 7 months since he died and 1 1/2 months since I found out, I am going out on my first date since I was 16. I am very nervous! Bet you can guess the first question I would like to ask him, but I won't. I asked the gentleman out for a walk in a beautiful park that, it turns out, he loves too. We are meeting at 11 AM for the walk and if it goes well I might ask him to lunch. If I do who pays for the lunch? I know it sounds like a ridiculous question but I literally haven't done this in 40 years! Do we go dutch?

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** November 3, 2023 3:35 pm

Step up and tell him you'll pay for your own lunch, even
before he says anything.

That way it should not be awkward Edited to add....and have a wonderful time

E.

Last edited by Ellexoh_nz (November 3, 2023 3:36 pm)

**Posted by Josephine** November 3, 2023 4:02 pm

Ellexoh nz, thank you for the advice! I thank you for the encouragement! Back when I was dating the man always paid but I like your advice! I will do that..! My counselor encouraged me to have fun with this and I think he is right! My husband had a very set way of being "proper" but I have always been more "laid back" and want to have more in life, I hope this makes sense. The last few days I have felt so much more free and it is wonderful!