If there is a facilitating Goldstar lesbian involved, many women will not actually believe that having sex with, or being in love them makes them a lesbian. I know three cases where the “flipped” wives vehemently deny that they are lesbians. In other cases, women who left their husbands to be with another woman, turn around at a later date to announce that they are not gay anymore and want to come back. I believe that in these cases, the wife has been in love or infatuated with an individual, but the actual lesbian identity is alien to them. When the magic spell wears off, there is no desire or need to seek out women in general. They wake up one morning in bed with an overbearing, tattooed, narcissistic, and or vain person in a house full of unopened jars. The thrill and excitement has gone. There is more actually missing over what they thought they had found. There is nothing you can do to prevent this from happening. The allure of love is stronger than an equally addictive drug. Each time they spend time with, or receive a simple message from this person they will get a hit. As long as she has the safety net of the marriage, she will believe that this can continue. Ask her to move in with the gay friend, to become who she really is. Tell the gay friend to have her, offer to take all of her stuff over to her place. See what happens. You don’t want to end up in some sort of is she, isn’t she limbo. You don’t need to accept this behaviour from her. You and your own mental health matters every bit as much as hers.
Ordinary guy wrote: