OurPath (formerly SSN) Open Forum / Thrown back into the storm

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** September 3, 2020 2:59 pm

This morning when I checked my phone I saw our joint email had 2 new emails. One of them was advertising from a website called Locanto. Strange. When I opened it the email didn't actually say what Locanto was so I googled it, already with a feeling in my gut that I guessed what I'd find.....another site like Craigslist. With several subtitles, one of which was Personal, and under that an ad "suck my nipples"
It threw me...into a triggered response. But sadly this was something I was expecting. And he may be using this site because we no longer have sex, and it may never progress to meeting anybody.

But that's not the point...is it.?

Then I read Kel's words that Musselburgh had included in her post today ...."As for why people seem to come out a good quarter century after being married......" and know I'm closer to the end of this

Elle

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** September 3, 2020 3:25 pm

MJM017 wrote:
I’m sorry, Elle. Marriage is never easy. These chance discoveries only add to the difficulty. Be kind to yourself.

When my daughter dropped her son off to me this morning I mentioned the website and we talked about it. Then she said very prophetically "But I thought you said it didn't matter anymore?"

Which immediately brought me back from the ghastly, sick, lost feelings to......"I've moved past all this"

So I suppose MJ (thank you)...I am being kind to myself, I just needed my daughter to say what she did

Elle

**Posted by Musselburgh** September 4, 2020 6:14 am

I'm sorry to hear this Elle. This is the problem with living this life..we are always waiting for 'a shoe to drop'. I hope you are ok and wish you all the best as you move forward. Take care x

Last edited by Musselburgh (September 4, 2020 6:16 am)

**Posted by Lynne** September 4, 2020 7:50 am

Deleted.

Last edited by Lynne (October 3, 2020 5:26 pm)

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** September 4, 2020 1:54 pm

Musselburgh wrote:
I'm sorry to hear this Elle. This is the problem with living this life..we are always waiting for 'a shoe to drop'. I hope you are ok and wish you all the best as you move forward. Take care x

Thank you MB I'm sure it's only a momentary setback. The choices my partner makes are his not mine

**Posted by Ellexoh_nz** September 4, 2020 2:04 pm

Longway and Lynne...I do get what you're saying but for myself...calling it abusive makes me sound like a victim, and I refuse to be one.
In his eyes anyway!