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Heard this old one the other day and it acted as a trigger;..I know not a strong optimist song...
And I would do anything for love
I'd run right into hell and back
I would do anything for love
I'll never lie to you and that's a fact
But I'll never forget the way
You feel right now, oh no, no way
And I would do anything for love
But I won't do that
No, I won't do that
..
Meatloaf - I'll do anything for love
Made me think about the trauma bonding I had or insane loyalty....really how I would have done anything for my then wife. I loved her.
But I could not put up with the cruelty and cheating. I could not light myself on fire.
I still possess fierce love, kindness and loyalty...she rejected it.,..it doesn't mean I didn't give it.
I'm doing so much better now....I look back with sadness and some reverie ... I look forward with curiosity and hope.