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A great summary article I came across - many of us have lived with this person.... remember, knowledge is power.
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Thanks Daryl, very nice summary. I soooo recognize this person LOL! Knowledge is definitely power. The more I learn about this personality trait, the less my ex is able to bother me.
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Yep i got 20 tactics pulled on me.. I ended my marriage and relationship with my gay narcissist in complete silence.. i refused to get into any conversation with her..
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Excellent. And as a reminder for those just starting this hellish journey, no contact, no contact, no contact. The more you practice it, it literally becomes second nature.
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Well now wasn't that a very interesting read, I'm going to save it. I've people asking me to explain narcissism and this is perfect (just like I always thought I was according to my very STBX) LOL!! Thanks for sharing Daryl
Last edited by Foolme (May 31, 2017 2:29 am)
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How important is no contact? I'm so fresh at this I don't even know what to think. I don't WANT no contact because I love my husband and I see him as a broken person who needs someone to love and understand him. I miss the children- they were his biologically.
He says I have these traits.
My mind....I just can't keep anything straight. (No pun intended)
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When there are children involved or, as in this case, children you treat as if they are yours, no contact isn't completely possible. Then you have to ask yourself what the contact is about. Is it about the kids or really about him? There's nothing wrong with wishing him to get better but that's not your job anymore. He's an adult, he has to want this and take the steps needed. If you are subordinating your best interests to him, that is not healthy. You should read up on co-dependency and see if this sounds like you. Are the kids old enough to have smartphones and make some of their own choices? If so make sure they know they can always visit or text you as long as their Father is aware of where they are. I don't know if you have looked into any sort of counseling for yourself but I think you should. You are dealing with someone with no empathy and that is hard for a normal person to wrap their mind around when trying to figure out that person's actions and motivations.
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Thank you. They do have phones and contact me regularly. Their dad contacts me for a lot of things, including the kids. He can barely handle them and they do not respect him. It's a really sad situation.
I am definitely codependent oriented. I read about it often and I'm aware that it is totally me. I start a new counselor next Thursday.
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Thanks for posting this list, Daryl. It's intense! I've lived with every one of the things on that list. Scary.
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