OurPath Open Forum
This forum is for discussion of issues related to Mixed Orientation relationships only, that is when one partner is heterosexual (straight) and one is Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender or Questioning.
If this does not apply to your topic, please find another forum.
* Opinions posted here, including that of the Administrator, are the poster's own and do not necessarily reflect the views or policies of OurPath.
* As a peer-to-peer network, any advice given is that of a peer, based on personal experience, and should not be considered professional in nature.
* Any discussion of LGBT related issues is acceptable provided it remains constructive and respectful of other viewpoints. Hateful, degrading, or prejudiced speech and/or personal attacks will not be tolerated.
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- Duped
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Re: Anyone with a transgender spouse
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Last edited by Duped (November 11, 2019 2:54 pm)
- OutofHisCloset
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Re: Anyone with a transgender spouse
Secretly,
"Weekly Amazon packages to support his habits" raises a hug red financial flag for me. I hope you are taking steps to protect your finances and your credit.
- SecretlySuffering
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Re: Anyone with a transgender spouse
I know, we just drafted a separation doc to be signed by an attorney next week. I will feel much better then. The current talk is all on transition. He is obsessed with it. I'll be glad when we are just co-parents and nothing further. We already agreed to not be married but live in the same space for the next few months. Out house is 4K sq ft so it's not hard to find our own space. I'm relieved and I don't think I have within me the particular strength required to be married to a trans man. There is absolutely no relationship whatsoever. Just a roommate situation. I will be happy to report when everything is signed. Huge load off my mind.
- OutofHisCloset
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Re: Anyone with a transgender spouse
Secretly,
"The 'particular strength' required to be married to a trans man"? Please be kinder to yourself; this isn't about your shortcomings. It's about the life choices your husband would force on you. To not want to have your life defined by his trans issues is not an indication that you lack "strength." It's an indication that you have the backbone to say that you won't subordinate yourself and cut off your own sexuality...you have the same rights and should have the same expectation of fulfillment as he does.
I'm glad you're doing what protects you.
- SecretlySuffering
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Re: Anyone with a transgender spouse
Thank you OOHC,
I agree, absolutely everything is fixated on his desires to be trans. It's consuming and destructive to my health. That is why I am getting out. Thank you for the encouragement, I really benefit from this site.
- OutofHisCloset
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Re: Anyone with a transgender spouse
Yes, it's terrifying, isn't it, the extent to which the desire to feminize the self becomes an all-consuming fixation and crowds out everything else. My husband would rather have a relationship with himself than with me and even our (adult) son. My son and his long time girlfriend just split up, and when I jokingly said perhaps our son could rent a house across the street that has just come open, my husband said he didn't want our son living so close. The reason? Because my husband was worried our son might come over and catch him wearing his girly clothes.
- Rob
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Re: Anyone with a transgender spouse
How sad...I would want my kids home or living as close to me as possible.
"For we walk by faith, not by sight .." 2Corinthians 5:7