Hi evoke,

I was in a short relationship like the one you're describing.  I was in a very experimental phase of my life, having been in a committed relationship for 16 years with a man who wasn't very interested in sex with me, and certainly not interested in any form of sex that could be remotely considered adventurous.  I'd tried some new things and it turned out I like them more than I thought I would, so that spurned me to try more new things.

I met this guy whom I slept with, but who had the world's tiniest penis.  I felt badly about deciding not to see him again, but I was at the point in my life where I felt like having good, satisfying sex wasn't something I was willing to give up on after my last experience.  I tried to gently break it off, and he started asking questions.  I had no good answer for him - I didn't want to hurt his feelings.  He finally guessed the issue.  I kept denying it, but he seemed..... INTO me telling him "You can't satisfy me."  He quickly said that he COULD make certain that I was satisfied.  How???  He suggested bringing a friend.  Now.... I was floored, to say the least.  I'd heard of threesomes before, but even those seemed like they'd be because all 3 people wanted to be with more than one partner at a time - NOT because one partner couldn't satisfy the other and called in reinforcements!  We kept seeing each other, and he kept on suggesting it.  So I tried it.  I didn't like it.  Despite them both telling me that I would get TWO men solely focused on me, what it felt like was two men both TAKING from me.  It wasn't double the pleasure - it was double the WORK!  I may as well have been a rag doll.  I simply wasn't interested.  I didn't regret trying it - I had learned what I didn't like.  But he was too INTO this cuckold thing.  It's like it was all he wanted.  And it was something that I DIDN'T want.  In my mind, we were at an impasse.

He would cool his jets for a while, and then he'd be right back to talking about it again.  I would tell him that he was NOT turning me on - he was making me want to leave.  He'd then tell me it wasn't something he HAD to have - it was just a fantasy.  Then two days later, he'd be back at hammering about it again.  No!  One time I called his bluff.  We were out to breakfast on a planned day off from work.  He said, "C'mon - it could be a great day."  I said, "What if I said yes?"  He then shocked me by pulling out his smartphone and showing me an ad he'd placed on Craigslist for a partner for us for that day.  Lots of responses already.  What the hell???  He was literally setting things up while I was telling him to back the f off????

He tried to convince me that this was a great deal for me - Iiiii got to sleep with whomever I wanted, whenever I wanted.  HE had to be faithful.  But that's not what this was.  It was about how the thought of me sleeping with someone else excited him.  Which meant that it wasn't about if/when I wanted to sleep with someone else - it was about him pushing me to do so, because that's what on HIS agenda.  It wasn't going to be because I felt like it.  It was going to be because HE felt like me feeling like it.  Hell - he didn't even care if I felt like it - as long as I did it.

I also started to find out that he was sleeping with some of these men (that he wanted to have threesomes with) on the side - himself.  Uck.  So he was all OVER the place.  He, like your fiancee, also wanted to be dominated.  I told him that I wasn't into that.  I prefered to be the less agressive partner.  But he just kept trying to "coax" me out of that shell.  Only... it WASN'T a shell - it was what I liked.  I didn't need to change - he needed to go find a better match.

The thing is, they ALWAYS progress.  What they show you is only a sliver of what's really going on in their brain.  And if you won't do the things they want but they still want to be with you otherwise?  Then they WILL go find someone that WILL do those things - on the side.  It's not a good scenario.

Kel
 

Last edited by Kel (May 19, 2017 9:58 am)