I don't have children of my own, as I've stated before on these forums, but I student taught during college, and was a substitute teacher for 7th-9th grade for a few years. Obviously that's different from parenting but it's a perspective that let me observe kids at the early-adolescent stage, and I would see them 'en masse,' which let me wonder why some kids were developing one way and others were lagging or developing differently, or seeming not to be developing much at all. I don't mean physically, but in their ability to learn and absorb new ideas, as well as their social interactions. Twice I took it upon myself to notify Children's Protective Services, once for child endangerment and another for sexual abuse; how the regular teacher failed to see it or chose to ignore what was obvious, or didn't want to get involved, is something I will never understand. But my point is that not having kids sometimes puts you in a position to see what parents or teachers or other adults don't see, or don't want to see.

But this is my question - and it might be theoretical, or maybe someone here has experienced this - having been through what you've been through in your marriage, how would you react if one of your children did the same thing your spouse did to you? I mean, if you saw your own child, who you had inklings might be gay or lesbian, getting married to a straight person, knowing what you know now? What would you do?  How would you handle that? I'm curious, because I am not sure what I would do myself; how involved or not I would get; I know the concept that blood is thicker than water, but I also think people need to make their own decisions and make their own mistakes, but yet this is one that I know is likely to cause damage, so I think I would force the coming-out issue and try to stop him/her from marrying. Would I talk to the bride- or groom-to-be?  I honestly don't know how I would respond, so for me this is hypothetical. Just wondering if others have faced this or what your thoughts are about that.