I'm so happy this valentine's day.. nothing to get or stress over.  This and mothers day I was never able to get her anything she liked..jewelry, dinner, clothes...she always expected more.
  Its odd..it does not make me feel unloved...

Last edited by Rob (February 1, 2017 3:43 pm)

I am gonna try not to be sick again. Or too sad that is. He never really brought me anything on this day of love.. I would see the stands with flowers everywhere, the men running to their cars with such from malls and the like, I would go to CVS to buy him a card and watch all the men frantically mulling over the ones there to get their loves,  the news talking about how the husbands were out in force buying for the wives. The commercials leading up to such with big luxury cars and jewelry galore ads unending on TV. The jokey no gift for wife/ no sex for hubby sentiments.. Sweet little loving smiles given by people, blah, do I sound bitter? Yep, sorry to say I am. For years I heard of gifts and gestures and romantic dinners and beautiful bouquets  from family and friends,. and I got nothing for the most part. He's forgotten,..again, just happened to be broke that weekend, tired from working so very hard to support me and his children, temporarily memory loss, yada yada, I don't think I ever had a good valentine coming my way.. But I will say that I enjoyed buying for the ones I loved and did, like my kids, my mom and dad and friends when I could afford it, and hell even him!,, although I won't again. Last year he did buy me a big box of cheap chocolates, I didn't open them that day but...come the end of the night he wanted to know where they were.. I was waiting all evening for him to ask me,  so I told him to have a ball! Not the Cinderella one I expected for years JUST ONCE!


Oh well I love pumpkins just the same. Sorry going to be another bummer day for me! I'll get through it though!
 

Valentines Day doesn't bother me so much, because he always treated it like an obligation.  What's been more difficult is the complete lack of any spontaneous gesture of love or appreciation at any other time.  Over time I learned I could give myself gifts of small pleasures.  For years now I've been buying myself flowers at the grocery store on the weekend, and taking them to my office, where I can appreciate their beauty and color all day.  Being alone on Valentine's Day longing for love is tough (unless you're celebrating the day by being actively relieved), but it's not worse than spending the evening doing the same thing while with a spouse who is emotionally unavailable. 

I have the opposite problem - V Day isn't and never has been all that big of a deal to me.  But holidays are everything to my current husband, PLUS it's his birthday.  He likes to celebrate both, which can be a challenge.  How do you do a romantic dinner when the kids all want to see him then, too?  It's probably my highest stress day of the year!  Lol.

But if I were alone and it bothered me any, I think maybe I'd go buy myself some lovely flowers, get a nice bottle of wine, and do something different - like some wonderful cheeses and crackers for dinner - maybe some fruit, nuts, dried fruit.  Put on my favorite upbeat jazz music.  Then do a decadent ice cream for dessert.  Watch Sixteen Candles - funny, romantic but only a little bit.  Throwback to when life was simpler.  Enjoy yourself!

Kel