Well, it finally happened tonight. My husband admitted he is gay, not actually bisexual like he’s claimed since his arrest. After a very heated discussion, where I kept asking him “why” (telling him he owed me the truth after putting me through such hell), “why” did he risk the hope of reconciliation just to sext a man, “why” was he willing to throw away a 34 yr marriage, “why” was he willing to lie, in general, since his arrest……. the truth finally came out.

Not that I was surprised by him saying he was gay, I was surprised he was finally honest. He’s a narcissist, so honestly doesn’t come easy, obviously!

My emotions are all over the place since the conversation. Shock initially turned to utter sadness. Sadness over the loss of the future that will never be. A future he never really wanted anyway. It’s just so cruel to have strung me along all these years, lying to my face and screwing men behind my back.

We have a very complicated financial situation which will take several months to sort out, delaying me filing for divorce. The wait to do so seems unbearable at this point.