Hey Lost  

I've been immersed in the trans narrative for 3 years since my grandson decided to ask the world to affirm him as 
female. Anybody who won't becomes not worthy of his time. He and my daughter have disowned me. 
I also became friends with a man who had gender-reassignment at age 60, who I could talk to/ask questions and who had a very calm & sensible view about choice and acceptance.
Both of these trans people made a choice to change their lives. One who doesn't expect the world to see him as a woman and the other who is willing to shun those who love him or affirm him.
Through both I kept to my own view that "trans" is a made-up ideology, kids sucked in to it via social media/peer pressure, for adult men a sexual fantasy mostly originating from ghastly porn....that is ruining families, and society. 

You'll never know what came first....the closet or the depression but this load you say he's having to carry has definitely been passed on to you. Because you're there. And you feel partly responsible? You're not, don't go there! Be stronger, your husband is an adult, you shouldn't have to carry his burdens. Breathe deeply, make some decisions.

Elle




 

My husband denies he is also and I have spiraled. I have always suspected he was since we dated 14 years ago and the longer we have been together the more he has given in to that side of sexuality. There has always been a strong disconnect that I have faught so hard to fix thinking I was the problem! I wish I had the mental strength to go into detail but I have been emotionally neglected our entire real except in the very beginning! I have thought the more I carry and fix myself the better chances are that he will start feeling or treating me the way he did in
I had a couple affairs during our relationship. Although he has been there Physically I have felt so alone and dismissed.  he blames that for our problems but it doesn’t explain the cross dressing, anal ,oral sex on Dildos, Talking a lot about a gay “childhood” friend that he actually hasn’t even told me was gay… I snooped and found out! He even took our children to hang out with him at a festival that he had a booth at and my kids played with his kids.
I noticed on life 360 that he has spent several hours in a predominately LGBT community since we have been separated.
He has always treated me like he would treat his sister. Polite and would do anything for me. Tells me occasionally I look”nice” but never beautiful, hot, sexy, etc like a straight husband would!
This is just the tip of the Iceberg… it is so complex and there is so much more!
He is so much more invested emotionally in all his male friendships than he is in our relationship. Polite and would do anything for me. Tells me occasionally I look”nice” but never beautiful, hot, sexy, etc like a straight husband would! I wish I could say that I haven’t been honest with him about what I need and how the way he treats me makes me feel but I have and he just looks at me. Almost like he wants to tell me something but is ashamed. When we are in a sex act he will do something that most anyone would suspect as “gay” and he will look at me to see my expression. I usually act as if it doesn’t bother me. I feel so embarrassed and used.

This is just the tip of the Iceberg… it is so complex and there is so much more!

He has Ghosted me for  month and told me he doesn’t love me, isn’t attracted to me, & doesn’t care about me.

I am a small business owner and this is interfering with my business because it’s affecting my mental health so much! My nervous system is shot!!
I am exhausted and devestated.
We are seperated now and I just don’t know what to do and how to move forward!