It’s been years since I posted here, and wanted to send you all a message of hope, that things do get better, and most importantly you will be happy again. I discovered my husband was gay after  42 years of a truly happy marriage. Of course, he denied, and denied even with overwhelming evidence, but eventually after months of denial finally admitted he was gay, but then quickly retracted his statement. Finally, I realized it really didn’t matter to me how he identified himself, it didn’t matter, he certainly wasn’t straight or faithful, and as painful as it was I couldn’t ignore the evidence in front of me ( gay porn magazines, no sex with me for 10 years claiming ED, contracting hepatitis B from sexual encounters, male escort services, etc, etc) I truly loved my husband , and to the best of his ability I felt he loved me. But I valued myself more, and knew I couldn’t stay in this fraud of a marriage anymore, once I had knowledge, I couldn’t be used anymore, I couldn’t be a knowing “beard,” and I wasn’t going in that dam closet with him. I read that MOM arrangements usually end up divorced within three years, and I wasn’t going to waste anymore time. I knew what was right for me, I divorced the man I loved……Onward. It’s been five years since my divorce and I have no regrets. My ex husband is still in the closet and dating another woman, I am able to maintain a good relationship with my ex, we have children and grandchildren together. After my divorce, I got busy establishing a new life, new friends, new interests, traveling, and eventually, I met a new love. I am ok, I am happy, facing some health issues, and there is sadness that creeps in occasionally of the loss of what I had expected my life to be. But I had to accept my reality, and deal with it, I couldn’t ignore it, and if I choose to stay in my “best buddy roommate” , I would of never known what romance was, or even how a straight man really desires a woman. My advice to all is move on, onward, you deserve better, you didn’t sign up for this, Onward.