Yes, I am an ally of the LGBTQIA community. I am not an ally of anyone being deceptive and hurting others based on their sexual preference. The behaviors from most of the stories in the forum are based on selfish reasons with no regard for the straight-spouse. We also don’t hear many stories of the one who caused the damage coming back to apologize to the straight-spouse sincerely! That’s my problem - no accountability, no remorse, just happy you came out!

I think the term "ally" is politically charged, so I would not call myself an ally. I would prefer a term exist that encompassed the needs and concerns of all orientations at once, vis a vis the golden rule. If it is only considering the needs of certain "identities" of people, it is biased. I think my reason for not being an "ally" is quite similar to many people's (including other posts above) fundamental reason for being an ally. I don't like the sectioning off of groups of people in opposition to others (in this case, cis-gender). This is why extremism and stretching the boundaries of actions and thought have led to the absurd in many cases today. It also allows those who've been violent and abusive in extreme ways to be patted on the back rather than receive due justice. Balance considers all groups equally, and the LGBTQ+ movement very much goes against that. Basically, I think the term "ally" is poor because in my opinion it and the movement it supports oppose the golden rule and ensures violence/violent people can live and do freely under the radar. I align strongly with Anon2222's first response.

I haven't logged into this forum in over a year, but this exact topic was bugging me today. When will justice come? When will equality actually exist?

I still have a barrier in calling people trusted friends when they blindly support this movement without question or thought about the destruction of cis-gender people's lives, or thought about angles of viewing such situations apart from the marketed message. Because of this, I distanced myself from a lot of people in my life years ago.

It's also a shame there's a clear ban on funding much of anything that truly acknowledges the straight partner's lived experience. That is probably a large reason there's blind support of the movement and animosity when people say they have qualifications about it. A good part is ignorance-- assuming people actually generally would support the golden rule. If they knew, they would probably view it as muddled waters of virtue and morality; that it is a grey area rather than bright colors.