Jay wrote:

 ...........Could anyone point me towards research studies on infidelity and divorce rates for bisexual women in relationships and marriage with men over the long term?......

Is your google broken?

Elle
 

M-Kate wrote:

.........I think that I read somewhere that only 15% of MOM last for more than 5 years....

 

I read an article a few years ago....so long ago I remember only one detail....that a r'ship where a spouse comes out one third of them end after 3 years. 
3 years was the measure I used to determine whether or not to continue/try any more/give up on my own r'ship. 

It turned out to be a good way to gauge it and gave me a "if it's not better by this date" point in time to work towards.

Elle
 

Hello Jay! 
Unfortunately there just simply are no REPUTABLE studies out there. I personally have found after over 17 years in spaces such as this.. that the happy, successful, "normal" couples living in mixed orientation relationships are simply just doing it quietly. As if it is no big deal. Often they are confused about why it is such a big deal and why groups like this are needed.... so the data is very skewed. People find themselves in these spaces because they are struggling. That makes it feel like ALL mixed orientation relationships must be struggling or on the brink of failure but it simply is not true. We are just seeing into a very specific window here. I do want to let you know there are positive spaces out there with many couples who are striving to make it work.  

You hit the nail on the head right here..

"Success in these areas must depend on many factors in most cases. The quality of the relationship overall and the individuals involved must be key pieces of the puzzle. "

 

Hi John, also Scott who posted his story before you.

It's ages ago now for me and I'm still not entirely sure which shocked me more - that he had been lying to me about his sexuality or that he had been manipulating me.

So my suggestion is that before doing any searching for ways to make it work (let your wives do that) you take a step back.  In the light of this new information, take a fresh look at her.

wishing you all the best, it is a tough place to find yourself in.  Lily

Last edited by lily (July 16, 2024 5:12 pm)

It depends very much on whether there is value in the relationship from the gay partners point of view. Questions regarding their sexual identities tend to crop up when they have completed their overriding objectives. They may feel that there is nothing left to hold them back from fully realising what they want from life rather than considering what they needed at the time. I doubt that many of the relationships, particularly marriages, are recorded as ending due to one of the partners coming out as something other than straight. I believe that all MOMs start out with the correct intentions. This will have to be something that both parties agree to, to protect the aspects of the relationship that they value. There is also a significant difference in the way that the different sexes approach MOMs. It is far harder for a woman to respect a man who is having sexual relations with other men than it is for a man to respect a woman who is having sex with another woman. Ultimately, individual personalities and honesty are the life blood of all MOMs. This and whether both parties are getting satisfaction from the relationship. Relationships should not take work. They are not something you should have to consciously work on. They should be mutually compatible to the point where they can be simply enjoyed. It should feel like home. If it doesn’t, it will only become a permanent stress.