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- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: 2022 was a fucked-up year
LostAtSea wrote:
You don’t know someone till you divorce them. I totally believe this.
I just received another lawyers bill for $800 !@#$%^ (thanks Mum....I couldn't do it without her estate money)
E
KIA KAHA
- Otter
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Re: 2022 was a fucked-up year
Your post/this thread is really helping me- thank you. I’ve felt so alone these past few months. I have support from a tight group of friends/family along with a therapist and a lawyer, but it’s not the same as learning from those who are walking the same path.
- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: 2022 was a fucked-up year
Your post/this thread is really helping me- thank you. I’ve felt so alone these past few months. I have support from a tight group of friends/family along with a therapist and a lawyer, but it’s not the same as learning from those who are walking the same path.
Otter....welcome to our Forum 
Thank you for the thank you.
5-6 years ago....I couldn't breathe. Today I take deep breaths and know I am almost through the storm.
“And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain, when you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.” ~ Haruki Murakami ~
Elle
KIA KAHA
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Thread Starter- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: 2022 was a fucked-up year
Saturday 27th May
I did it, yesterday I can say I left the r'ship that's been the cause of so much inner turmoil. For so many years.
It may not be fully over. There are still loose ends...i's to dot and t's to cross and I'm kind of in a no man's land still living out of a suitcase for perhaps another week (or less) but....I did it
Elle
KIA KAHA
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Thread Starter- Sam (Admin)
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Re: 2022 was a fucked-up year
Still Saturday here.... glad you could finally do it. I found that the uncertainty leading up to that step was far worse than the reality that came after. Good luck.
- Grace1958
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Re: 2022 was a fucked-up year
Saturday 27th May
I did it, yesterday I can say I left the r'ship that's been the cause of so much inner turmoil. For so many years.
It may not be fully over. There are still loose ends...i's to dot and t's to cross and I'm kind of in a no man's land still living out of a suitcase for perhaps another week (or less) but....I did it
Elle
How brave you are, Elle. Many kudos on making this choice for your wellbeing.
- Rob
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Re: 2022 was a fucked-up year
Steady on Elle,
When my GX left (with the kids for maximum hurt) it was like a load of bricks was physically lifted off my chest. I never felt brave but I knew deep in my bones then it was the thing to do. Now, years out if you put a gun to my head I would never go back to that life.
"For we walk by faith, not by sight .." 2Corinthians 5:7
- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: 2022 was a fucked-up year
Sam, Grace and Rob...thank you, I'm kinda numb. Like...a few years back it was so easy to tell the people closest to me what was happening, but I have all these not-so-close but should-be-told people in my life I care about that I will have to tell now and I don't want to leave it too late
Do I do it in a group message....2 groups, A's family and my circle....one by one?!! Because there are people who will be surprised/shocked by this.
E
KIA KAHA
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Thread Starter- Daryl
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Re: 2022 was a fucked-up year
That's a dilemma. One by one could take time, and word will spread while you're talking to someone else. Then there might be people who felt they should have known before someone else in the line. It sounds complicated.
Groups might work, if done by family, or at least in smaller, and more manageable groups. Whether it's in person or electronically, it might be best if you made a joint statement, maybe answered a few obvious questions about residences and timing of the legal matters, and then you both leave people to process this. Friends and other folks can reach you later to offer their support. You will know better than us how people may react. Tailor it as best you can.
Last edited by Daryl (May 29, 2023 7:10 pm)
“The future is unwritten.”
― Joe Strummer
- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: 2022 was a fucked-up year
I had been staying with my daughter to spend time with her before leaving for a new city, new life.
Well I am here! I flew in yesterday, picked up by my son. I feel safe, I feel loved, I have time to settle in with no pressure. Yesterday there were boxes everywhere....finding a place for this, a home for that and more to do, a budget to figure out, some pension stuff..... but I have the rest of my life to do it
Elle
KIA KAHA
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Thread Starter