"A horrible person" Are you kidding me?!?!

You are NOT a horrible person. You are a woman... a straight woman I assume... who married A MAN. This is a HUGE reveal that you have had foisted on you and you shouldn't feel guilty in any way for struggling with it.

It's a sad reality that some closeted LGBT people are, or seem, very homophobic. I assume it's because of jealousy. They see people living the life they secretly want to live and they hate it.

Your husband is living in some sort of fantasy world is he thinks he can do this and that you should just see it as a bit of 'fun' or no big deal. It's a HUGE deal and if he wants to save his marriage he needs to talk to you A LOT and make sure he knows how you feel about it.

In this circumstance people here usually ask this simple question. 'Is this what you signed up for?'  If it's not you need to tell your husband that and start working on solutions to what could be a marriage breaking problem. If he continues down this track - which is his prerogative to do I guess - he needs to know sooner rather than later that you might not be willing to take this journey with him.

Last edited by Steve (June 13, 2016 4:37 pm)

And what about your choices? They matter although it seems they don't matter to your spouse. What if your choice is that you really can't be married to a cross-dresser. Someone here once said "You're not obligated  to set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm."

Wow confusedwife.  Your husband sounds like he's really owning his, what do we call it, new found Feminine side?  His gayness.

So let's be rational and kind about this.  So let's say you support him dressing like a woman and wearing makeup...ie you have say an eccentric husband.  But how is he treating you?  Is he kind? Does he lie and you mistrust him.

If all my ex wife was doing is dressing more like a guy and wearing no make up I'd have no pro blem with it.  But she is much much worst..cheating with her girlfriend, treating me horribly,
Lying stealing..you name it.

No I'd have to agree with the others..you husband sounds like a narcissist and the gayness and treatment of you is not what you signed up for...

Your last reply implies there are other issues.  If you are being abused, the cross dressing issue is not the most important. Please take care of yourself and explore your options. If you trust your friend you should probably listen.

Don't be too hard on yourself.    We all try to make our spouses happy in a marriage.    He doesn't seem to be considering you.   You may have to leave him.      If my lezex had come to me and said she was unhappy in the marriage..I would have done anything for her.   But she simply started having a gay affair...then she tried to tell me how I never listened to how unhappy she was.. untrue...she never said anything and even if she was unhappy that does not justify becoming gay and having an affair.   We seemed to get blamed for all troubles in their lives.

You can't stop him from cross dressing.. but  that doesnt mean you have to live with it....its not normal... I have no desire to cross dress.     Take care of you... someone has to look out for you.