OurPath Open Forum
This forum is for discussion of issues related to Mixed Orientation relationships only, that is when one partner is heterosexual (straight) and one is Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender or Questioning.
If this does not apply to your topic, please find another forum.
* Opinions posted here, including that of the Administrator, are the poster's own and do not necessarily reflect the views or policies of OurPath.
* As a peer-to-peer network, any advice given is that of a peer, based on personal experience, and should not be considered professional in nature.
* Any discussion of LGBT related issues is acceptable provided it remains constructive and respectful of other viewpoints. Hateful, degrading, or prejudiced speech and/or personal attacks will not be tolerated.
NOTE: Due to recurring spam abuse, you must register to post.
1 of 1- True
- Member
Offline 
Just Venting
When I realized my ITCGH secret, I’ve got so many emotions, I wonder if I’ll ever overcome? It’s a constant nightmare wondering who’s he’s meeting up with & when?, my trust for him is completely broken. What hurts so damn bad’ is now realizing I married a man who wore his mask well & still does to this day. God I can only hope I can find myself again moving forward.
My ITCH has to be a Narcissist / Psychopath! he fits the criteria this is certain, who can live a lie their entire life & not have any empathy or shame in his behavior he’s engaged?. Only those who have a Personality Disorder.
it’s such a shame cause I’ve given him my entire life! only to realize my endless love & admiration for him was a one sided relationship, I gave all’ & he took all with out any remorse.
Today we sleep in separate rooms & our relationship is that of a convince, he’s like a “ best friend I can’t trust” it’s all so crazy and painful at the same time. It’s one big ShitShow MindFuck!…
I’m a Scorned Str8 Spouse, with feelings of hurt’ rage’ sadness’ & a part of me want’s to get even…
I’ll close for now.
signing off
True
Last edited by True (December 15, 2022 1:31 pm)
"And you will know the truth, & the truth will set you free"
John 8:32
True ❤️.
- gwendolyn_C
- Member
Offline
Re: Just Venting
True - I understand your pain. I also have an ITCGH! We have been living in separate bedrooms for over two years. It hurts to realize that I have been deceived by someone I earnestly loved and gave my all as a wife. It hurts, and I'm upset with him that I have to find the strength to get out of this mess! I'm angry that he took my love and kindness for granted! I understand this is a phase of my life, and I'm still responsible for my actions. I believe in the Golden Rule/Karma. It's not my job to get even or to make him see my point of view. One day he will have to face his actions and look in the Mirror. It's my job to consider my Children's needs and my needs to heal from this situation.
We'll make it through this! We will have our moments, but we'll get through it.
- True
- Member
Offline
Re: Just Venting
@Gwendolyn
So true’ appreciate your support and compassion, it’s refreshing having you reach out.
I’d like to believe in karma & at one point I did. But truth be told I’ve changed my perspective feeling
“ The Good Guy Finishes Last, It Doesn’t Pay To Be The Good Guy “ We get taken advantage of’ tell we say enough.
I’ think’ for my ITCGH to carry his lie’ not willing to come out is in itself torture for me. We both know but he’ll deny it like there’s no tomorrow. As he stated not to long ago Bashing Married Gay Men Living The Best Of Both Worlds! I’m like WTH? He just said that! Hmm 🤔. He just projected his own life & feelings. Sad but true.
I’m not gonna start life over at my age, completely walk away & end up struggling worse than I am now financially, however I’m working through the steps of grieving, bouncing between being totally pissed off at him & acceptance as I’m concentrating on my emotional wellness & becoming more independent, I think this is key, moving forward in my situation & journey.
Hopefully you’re at the age’ that you can make necessary life changes & adjustments if you so choose, time is on your side.
One thing is certain being a Str8 Spouse has got to be one of the hardest to endure.
Thx for sharing & concern 💫
True.
Last edited by True (December 15, 2022 9:45 pm)
"And you will know the truth, & the truth will set you free"
John 8:32
True ❤️.
- •
Thread Starter- gwendolyn_C
- Member
Offline
Re: Just Venting
True wrote:
@Gwendolyn
As he stated not to long ago Bashing Married Gay Men Living The Best Of Both Worlds! I’m like WTH? He just said that! Hmm 🤔. He just projected his own life & feelings. Sad but true.
I’m not gonna start life over at my age, completely walk away & end up struggling worse than I am now financially, however I’m working through the steps of grieving, bouncing between being totally pissed off at him & acceptance as I’m concentrating on my emotional wellness & becoming more independent, I think this is key, moving forward in my situation & journey.
Hopefully you’re at the age’ that you can make necessary life changes & adjustments if you so choose, time is on your side.
One thing is certain being a Str8 Spouse has got to be one of the hardest to endure.
Thx for sharing & concern 💫
True.
True - WOW - living both lives, indeed! WTH!?!
You are thinking smart to concentrate on your emotional wellness and strategize independence! Let this become your FUEL to get to a better place. These ITCGHs have used us for years! It's ok if we make decisions and create boundaries on our terms!
I agree - this is NOT an easy place! I would not wish this on my worst enemy!
Last edited by gwendolyn_C (December 16, 2022 1:29 pm)