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June 26, 2022 9:42 am  #1

Therapy can help

I asked my therapist (who is trans friendly btw) how to decide whether to stay or go (when/if I can).
I just felt like I had to figure it out now so I'm not conflicted later and make the wrong decision.
She asked me, if he died what would I most miss?
I had to think and said, sadly, not much.
I mean, I don't want him to die, obviously. I want him to go be happy but the operative word there is "go".
Other than financially and the occasional heavy thing to lift, he does not improve my life. 
He's got ADHD and is essentially a grown man I have to pick up after. 
It's just that now, that person is leaving panties and bras all over instead of t shirts and jeans. 
We don't watch the same shows except for maybe 4 in the fall and spring.  He's got that porn addiction.
He does his share of chores with prodding. 
He's not trying at all to find a therapist for himself.
Oh, he called and left a message at one place a month ago.
Now whether that's because he's not ready to know his truth or because he's just lazy I cannot say.
But I can't really force him either.
But I can stick to my decision to leave if he does not figure himself out before I have the opportunity.
I can understand that I can love him and not be willing to live with him.
So, yeah. For now I'm here. I'm just as alone as I would be living alone but have better circumstances financially. But when they have a low income Sr housing for me, I'd say it's 90/10 I'll take the place and move on.
I think that therapy can help us figure out where we stand emotionally, even if we cannot act on it physically for financial reasons. 


June 26, 2022 2:35 pm  #2

Re: Therapy can help

Grace1958 wrote:

.......So, yeah. For now I'm here. I'm just as alone as I would be living alone but have better circumstances financially..... 

I hear you Grace!


KIA KAHA                       

June 27, 2022 8:14 am  #3

Re: Therapy can help

I also understand. I stayed with my gay ex boyfriend for a year.


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