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1 - onceuponatime
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What I wish I could tell my still-legally husband
What I think about you:
That you were a coward for not dealing with your feelings a long time ago.
That I hope one day you love somebody as much as I loved you, believe that that person loves you and will always be there for you, that you have found your best friend, and someone that accepts you just the way you are. That you feel like the luckiest person in the world for having that person next to you, that you wonder how you got to be so lucky. And that one day, that person stops loving you, and takes everything you ever believed to be true from you. That you feel abandoned, betrayed, and hopeless, with a big whole where your heart used to be. That all your plans for your life are erased with just a few words. That you are left picking up the pieces of your life and wondering how you ever ended up in that situation. When all of that happens, you will finally understand the impact your decisions have had in my life.
And really, go f&ck yourself.
- SusanneH
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Re: What I wish I could tell my still-legally husband
I’m sorry you’re hurting. Hope that helped 😊.
(((((HUGS)))))
Susanne
- LostAtSea
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Re: What I wish I could tell my still-legally husband
Once,
Your post sums up EXACTLY what I wrote to the "other"!!!!
My only wish out of all this is that he experiences the pain and hurt. The next person who enters his life, I hope they deceive and betray him and shatters his world. In fact, I CAN NOT wait till this happens. I seriously pray for this as it will be the ONLY way he will understand what he has done to me and my family.
I hope someone deceives him so that he will understand the trauma he has inflicted on me that will scar me for life.
- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: What I wish I could tell my still-legally husband
onceuponatime wrote:
.....And really, go f&ck yourself.
Yeah I've thought of writing some stuff down to tell him how I think, what I hope for him, but I know it would mean nothing to him. He wouldn't keep it....to read later....to read again. If it was an email he'd delete it, if it was written it would end up in the rubbish.
He's a man who puts no stock in keeping anything 'emotional' (unless it's about history (war), or his own family, old photos, I have detached from him so much I don't see the point of trying to 'get to him'
I do have an email draft I started writing out a couple of years ago, telling my story, of my disappointment, sadness, my distress....but that is for my children to read when the time comes
Once....you need to put the u (you) into the "fuck you"
Elle
KIA KAHA
- newtotheclub
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Re: What I wish I could tell my still-legally husband
What I think about you:
That you were a coward for not dealing with your feelings a long time ago.
That I hope one day you love somebody as much as I loved you, believe that that person loves you and will always be there for you, that you have found your best friend, and someone that accepts you just the way you are. That you feel like the luckiest person in the world for having that person next to you, that you wonder how you got to be so lucky. And that one day, that person stops loving you, and takes everything you ever believed to be true from you. That you feel abandoned, betrayed, and hopeless, with a big whole where your heart used to be. That all your plans for your life are erased with just a few words. That you are left picking up the pieces of your life and wondering how you ever ended up in that situation. When all of that happens, you will finally understand the impact your decisions have had in my life.
And really, go f&ck yourself.
So i am just confused about the fact that they are so chill about robbing someone of true happiness. What do we think of Karma.. i wonder do you have to have a personality disorder to fuck with somone's life this way. I feel like i am in a nightmare and my husband is worried about what people will think of him! ridiculous
- EmpathyStarved
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Re: What I wish I could tell my still-legally husband
Ugh I feel this and I hope it's helpful for you to at least write it down and put it out there. I've tried many times to get my GEX to understand the trauma and devastation his lies and actions have caused, but I don't think it ever really hits home. I never get genuine apologies or any real empathy from him, hence my username.
- Heartbroken49
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Re: What I wish I could tell my still-legally husband
OMG I could have wrote this word for word. I feel your pain but we will get through this ❤️ I just struggle to understand how someone we have spent years with can treat us this way, be so deceitful, not give a sh#t about the hurt they have caused. And actually think they are entitled to go and enjoy their new life. Not a chance. They robbed us of a normal relationship, lied and treated us as a fill in, till they were ready to expose their secrets. I can’t help the bitterness I feel. I hope one day We all get to the point of not dissecting every part of our lives with our significant other and find our happiest days, either with someone who loves us wholly or just happy living our best lives. Good luck to all of us, our happy ever after is around the corner 🤞💔
- MJM017
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Re: What I wish I could tell my still-legally husband
.....And really, go f&ck yourself.
...you need to put the u (you) into the "fuck you"
Amen to both of these!
Anger is an undervalued emotion for women. Most of us were raised to be so happy if some guy showed interest in us, like we're nothing without him. If we get angry because we get a defective one, we have to go to couples' therapy. (but I wanna leave) We get blamed and we have to fix them or twist ourselves into a pretzel to be a proper lady. No!
Get good and angry. We deserve it after what we've gone through. . My face didn't turn into a permanent scowl, I didn't turn into a lonely, bitter shrew, I haven't turned into a w(b)itch. This is the only road to healing. Get angry and angry and angry until the pain decreases.
Anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong. Do this. :-p
I feel better already.
The Wicked Witch of The West (aka Maria)
No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa
- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: What I wish I could tell my still-legally husband
....
LOL@
The Wicked Witch of The West (aka Maria)
Elle
KIA KAHA
- TangledOil
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Re: What I wish I could tell my still-legally husband
Once,
What would be the harm in telling him? It seems like it would make you feel better to get this off your chest. Try to go in as neutral as possible, not angry (even though I understand that you are), and tell him. Is it not safe for you to do so? Would you be putting yourself at risk?
Tangled