A thread for "aha moments" that don't necessarily fit into other threads.

*told to me by a stunning airline attendant yesterday, one of her aha moments became a new aha moment for me, too: her GIDX's favorite vacation spot was Maui so they went all the time, I guess her job made that easy. He would be amorous beyond belief on the flight to Maui, HI-- as she later discovered, the world's down-low capital for closeted GID men-- and as soon as the plane touched down he'd verbally attack her and keep at it until she freaked out at which point he'd storm off and not come back for hours, claiming he needed to "cool off." Once he returned to their hotel hours later he'd be relaxed and "nice again" for another 12 hours, then get increasingly restless and hostile, pick another fight, leave her in the fetal position on the bed, and storm off to "cool off." Over and over. For the whole trip. Every time. And it was his favorite destination so they went countless times.
Once she figured out his screen name (he used the same one on all the gay sites) she was able to track him from site to site-- to all his down-low gay apps, dating sites, including trannydate.com (she sent me his profile pics and they leave zip to the imagination) and his "likes" were consistent-- orgies, "water sports" (urine play), TG/TS/TV, toys, "nipple torture," BDSM, fetishes, etc.) And she took screenshots of it all as proof.
From listening to her story, the aha moment for me personally was her description of her GIDX routinely "picking fights in paradise"-- because that's what my GIDX did. He was all over me kissing and cooing on the flight out, then he'd do or say something stunningly vicious the moment we landed, then repeatedly til the end of the trip, always then disappearing for hours to "cool off" and coming back calmer. He came back cold, with no eye contact, but calm and no longer vicious.
The aha: that that's how they got away from us to go cruise and hook up-- by picking fights very suddenly, just a 180 in mood, saying vicious things to provoke a bitter fight, then storming off to "cool off" but it was actually for gay cruising and sex.

*aha moment of realization, 15 months after leaving him: 7 months into our relationship (which featured "amazing incredible best-ever" sex, or so I thought), one morning after lovemaking, he suddenly praised me, with some odd condescension, for my having come "for the very first time in all this time we've been together." He appeared to have ZERO memory of the thousands of orgasms that I not only had had with him-- but which we'd joked about (the theme being: how fantastic my GIDX was in bed-- how skillful, how masterful of my body.) The pleasure he brought me was not something I ever hid, and more than that, it had seemed to be a huge point of pride for him. And then 7 months in, one day, he suddenly says afterward "good girl, you know that's the very first time you've had an orgasm with me."
Uh. Where was he for the first thousand? I think we can guess. The worst part, is he gave me all those orgasms LOOKING RIGHT INTO MY EYES. That's some pretty hardcore dissociation, there. To be right there inside a woman and looking into her eyes during it..... and "not remember" any of them. Obviously he was with someone else in his head while he stared into my eyes with that loving expression on his face.

Last edited by Billie (October 29, 2016 5:17 pm)