There are often lawyers who will do an uncontested divorce (unless there are custody issues) for a flat fee.  That's what I would recommend. 

I did a quick read of the Massachusetts .gov site on divorce, and "fault, uncontested" is not listed as an option, but consulting a lawyer or legal aid would tell you for sure.  

 I don't know how mediation works in Massachusetts, but where I live mediation is for those who disagree on terms, mandated by the courts for those with children, and supplements rather than replaces a lawyer, who is needed in any case to write up the agreements, so make sure to do your homework there.  (My ex thought mediation was the way to go because he thought it would be cheaper and "friendlier" than a lawyer--meaning he thought I'd be more manipulable.  He was also in the closet and terrified I might let his secret out.) 

My advice is "Don't get divorced without a lawyer."  When you're dealing with injury and illness you need a doctor, and the same is true here: when you're dealing with the law, you need a lawyer.  For one thing, they know their way around the laws, the procedures, and the courts.  A lawyer can tell you your rights under the law in divorce, and help you advocate for yourself. Once I learned what I was entitled to under the law, and knew the courts would back me up, I told my then-husband that I wanted a better settlement.  Many of us here have been subtly (or not so subtly) groomed by our spouses in ways that disadvantage us when it comes to standing up for ourselves or demanding equal treatment, and a lawyer can help combat that.

 Also: not all lawyers bill and operate the same way.  I consulted several, and the terms were quite different for each in terms of the size of the retainer, the hourly fees, the transparency of billing, how much you can do to avoid fees (like filling out financial paperwork), how much the divorce was likely to cost (one wouldn't even give me a ballpark figure--I didn't go with her).  The most important factor about finances to examine when you consult with a lawyer is transparency: does the lawyer tell you how your money will be spent, how much they think your divorce will cost given that you and your spouse are in general agreement on the split of assets, what unavoidable court costs/filing fees there are, etc.  I got my divorce for less than two thousand dollars.  

  I don't know how it works in MA, but if you're getting an uncontested divorce, you may not even need two lawyers, one for you and one for him. My spouse wanted to avoid an ugly battle, which he was sure would happen if we each had a lawyer, so I hired one (and I would not have agreed to his being the one to hire the lawyer, because he was acting so erratically that I did not trust him).  She understood that my husband and I wanted to be "amicable," but told me she worked for me and it was her responsibility to advocate for my interests, and although I didn't always act on her information (she told me, for example, that I could get more than I ended up asking for, but I made a conscious decision to let the house go to him for less than it was worth because I knew I would have been the one to do all the work to ready it to sell), I'm very glad I had her in my corner.  
 

Last edited by OutofHisCloset (December 20, 2020 8:32 am)

I definitely recommend getting an attorney who will advise you and represent your interests. You only get one shot at this and you describe yourself as being in a difficult financial position. A lawyer may think of things that you have not and if your spouse if draining marital assets can get the court to stop him. 

There's an old saying "Marry in haste and repent it leisure." The same applies to divorce. Take the time and spend the money to get it right.

The financial situation I am in has to do with liquidity of assets. Since we have no children and no debit, all of our assets are in 401K, brokerage account, pension etc. We had ourselves financial setup to actually retire in 5 years in another country. I can not image if this happened abroad!!

I have told him I want more than 50% of the assets. He said he was find with that and the amount of money we have in savings currently I will receive 75%; however that is basically to start a new life again buy a car, find a job etc.

I have a decent job with decent pay and excellent benefits; however this will only last until July 2021 as my employer already stated all employees need to go back to the office after COVID. I do not want to stay in MA. Why would I? I know no one and only moved thare because of him. This means I have to give up my job with a raise coming up.

My worry is that I will not find another job with this salary and benefits and something that will interest me. I have tried before moving to MA and settled on what I could get. Now I am wondering how the spousal support works when one spouse has to quit and move and no job on the line and another spouse with a job and further earnings, bonuses and 15% raise yearly.