I would normally say this is a crazy question, but the way my life is now.... Nothing is crazy anymore.
A little background first, our marriage is no longer a marriage, it's now a contract. I am still living here only because it is convenient for me. It is no longer about US, it's about me. Our marriage has been in this state for almost a year now and although every day I think about when I can leave, I know, now is not the time. 
That being said, I can't allow myself to care anymore what he does or who he does it with. He claims he is not sexually active with anyone, just meeting people like him. I don't believe that anymore than I believe he can be straight to save our marriage. I didn't fall off the turnip truck yesterday. So.... a couple weeks ago he went to meet up with a trans person, he thought he might not be gay at all just trans, whatever.... He came home a few hours later and wanted to talk about his encounter, how he could never go as far as"her", the trans has gone and he could not live life like that, but then the weird statement. "We exchanged panties" Is this really a thing? I've guess I'm kinda dumb in this area, but, if this is a "thing" then I have issues that might push me out the door sooner than planned,. Years ago actually during our dating stage, I spent the weekend at his house and did a bit of laundry. There was a pair of tighty whities in the wash, he has never worn tighy wihities since I've known him. I thought it odd, but then just let it go. Now it is haunting my thoughts daily. So is exchanging underwear common or am I just looking for more reasons to back up my decision to leave.