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    September 3, 2020 2:59 pm  #1

    Ellexoh_nz
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    Thrown back into the storm

    This morning when I checked my phone I saw our  joint email had 2 new emails. One of them was advertising from a website called Locanto. Strange. When I opened it the email didn't actually say what Locanto was so I googled it, already with a feeling in my gut that I guessed what I'd find.....another site like Craigslist. With several subtitles, one of which was Personal, and under that an ad "suck my nipples" 
    It threw me...into a triggered response. But sadly this was something I was expecting. And he may be using this site because we no longer have sex, and it may never progress to meeting anybody.

    But that's not the point...is it.?

    Then I read Kel's words that Musselburgh had included in her post today ...."As for why people seem to come out a good quarter century after being married......" and know I'm closer to the end of this

    Elle

    KIA KAHA                       
     

    September 3, 2020 3:05 pm  #2

    MJM017
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    Re: Thrown back into the storm

    I’m sorry, Elle.  Marriage is never easy. These chance discoveries only add to the difficulty. Be kind to yourself.

    No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa 
     

    September 3, 2020 3:25 pm  #3

    Ellexoh_nz
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    Re: Thrown back into the storm

    MJM017 wrote:

    I’m sorry, Elle. Marriage is never easy. These chance discoveries only add to the difficulty. Be kind to yourself.

     

    When my daughter dropped her son off to me this morning I mentioned the website and we talked about it. Then she said very prophetically "But I thought you said it didn't matter anymore?"

    Which immediately brought me back from the ghastly, sick, lost feelings to......"I've moved past all this"

    So I suppose MJ (thank you)...I am being kind to myself, I just needed my daughter to say what she did  

    Elle
     

    KIA KAHA                       
       •Thread Starter
     

    September 3, 2020 3:54 pm  #4

    MJM017
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    Re: Thrown back into the storm

    Maybe it does matter to you? I don’t know. It would bother me & I’d distance myself from a partner. This is how I would be kind to myself.  We all have different paths in this life. Glad your daughter offered support.

    No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa 
     

    September 4, 2020 6:14 am  #5

    Musselburgh
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    Re: Thrown back into the storm

    I'm sorry to hear this Elle.  This is the problem with living this life..we are always waiting for 'a shoe to drop'.  I hope you are ok and wish you all the best as you move forward. Take care x

    Last edited by Musselburgh (September 4, 2020 6:16 am)

    Remember..you are braver than you believe, stronger than you feel and smarter than you think.
     

    September 4, 2020 7:50 am  #6

    Lynne
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    Re: Thrown back into the storm

    Deleted.

    Last edited by Lynne (October 3, 2020 5:26 pm)

     

    September 4, 2020 1:54 pm  #7

    Ellexoh_nz
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    Re: Thrown back into the storm

    Musselburgh wrote:

    I'm sorry to hear this Elle.  This is the problem with living this life..we are always waiting for 'a shoe to drop'.  I hope you are ok and wish you all the best as you move forward. Take care x

     

    Thank you MB I'm sure it's only a momentary setback. The choices my partner makes are his not mine 
     

    KIA KAHA                       
       •Thread Starter
     

    September 4, 2020 2:04 pm  #8

    Ellexoh_nz
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    Re: Thrown back into the storm

    Longway and Lynne...I do get what you're saying but for myself...calling it abusive makes me sound like a victim, and I refuse to be one.
    In his eyes anyway!

     

    KIA KAHA                       
       •Thread Starter
     

     

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