OurPath Open Forum
This forum is for discussion of issues related to Mixed Orientation relationships only, that is when one partner is heterosexual (straight) and one is Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender or Questioning.
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- DatingTrans
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Re: Dating a Transgender man and struggling
Thank you all for your input. Given some serious soul searching I have decided to leave my relationship. He is a wonderful man but the drama is too much for me.
- Whirligig
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Re: Dating a Transgender man and struggling
I'm sure it wasn't an easy decision but I have no doubt your choice will prove to be more emotionally healthy for you. Best wishes to you.
- MJM017
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Re: Dating a Transgender man and struggling
Is it clear to you when this behavior started? It may be temporary due to their excitement or it may be a trait they’ve kept hidden to keep you around during a difficult & expensive process.
I assume you’ve asked them about it. What is your gut reaction to the answer? Keep asking them if you feel dissatisfied with the answer. If they get irritated with your questioning, being self-absorbed is their permanent trait in my opinion.
My suggestion is to make no commitment to a person going through a major life change. They need to stand on their own two feet financially & psychologically first. They need to prove themselves to you.
Good luck and hope you make the best decision for your well being.
No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa
- MJM017
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Re: Dating a Transgender man and struggling
I should have read to the end! Am glad you reconsidered, OP. :-)
No - It's not too late. It's not hopeless. Even there, there's something I can do. I just have to find the will. Ikiru (1952), film directed by Akira Kurosawa
- OutofHisCloset
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Re: Dating a Transgender man and struggling
"make no commitment to a person going through a major life change"
So much this! After my experience staying for three years after my now ex revealed he believed he was "a woman in a man's body," I have decided that when someone up and decides to tell you they have discovered they have "same sex attraction" or are bisexual or are trans, the ONLY healthy choice for the straight partner is to say, "OK. You need to figure yourself out. And I can't help you do that. So we'll have to separate, legally (or divorce)." As Sean once said, "You can't help your husband be gay."
- control
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Re: Dating a Transgender man and struggling
I absolutely agree, you can’t help a spouse figure themselves out related to TGT, sexual orientation, etc. get out sooner than later for your own best interest. I’ve never heard of a situation yet where the couple’s relationship improved or TGT got better, or a trans became “not a trans”.
And worse than the sexual part of all this, in my case and many cases I’ve followed, the gay or trans spouse became angrier, more vindictive, and just showed so much more lack of character as time marched on! The resentment & anger just takes over many times. That’s when I came to realize reality about my GX. The mask had come off. I did not even know this person I’d spent most of my life with.
Best Wishes.