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November 12, 2019 12:33 pm  #1

My Rollercoaster Ride

Hey all, I’m new here.

My husband and I met in high school, together 17 years, married 13. We have 3 kids together ages 1, 3, and 11.

Reposting my story here. A few days ago my husband came out as gay to me. He’s since told me he is confused about his orientation but knows he’s either attracted to men or trans women.

This has hit me like a ton of bricks. This is my best friend. I’ve gone through all the emotions, but for the most part feel like a big part of me has died.

Our relationship was always so full and we had what I thought was an amazing sex life.

Looking back, now knowing, I can pinpoint times when I think he was slowly feeling me out to get the courage to come out.

My biggest concerns are losing the friendship with my husband and the kids. I’m worried about the confusion this is going to bring into their lives.

My husband goes back and forth between wanting to move out immediately or going to therapy and trying to work out a MOM.

I would do whatever it takes to continue the marriage and normalize things for my kids. They are the priority for me. But I want him to be comfortable with that.

Our kids can tel I’m an emotional wreck and that things aren’t okay. Our baby is crying more and more cranky, our preschooler has been getting angry more, and our oldest has been looking depressed.

I wish we could put aside all this to focus on them. I’m not sure how to express these feelings to him in a way he understands. He keeps telling me it wouldn’t be fair to either of us to live like that. I feel like it doesn’t matter what’s fair it matters how okay the kids are. I still want his friendship and companionship either way.


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