A year ago when I first found out my husband of 14 years is gay, I joined this network. Number of registered users where 1,087 and now its over 1,600 people. This is just registered users, not including hundreds of people who haven't registered yet. I've read hundreds of stories here from around the world and different cultures. We all have the following in common and if you are finding yourself in a place of doubt, you should trust your gut.

1- Our Gay in Denial significant others grew up in either religious families, close minded societies or countries who would shame you for being gay.
2-  They have temper. I felt like walking on eggshells all my marriage. He was over sensitive, and I was always the one to blame.
3-  We, the spouses, never felt enough. Not motherly enough, not sexy enough, not woman enough....
4- Sex is mostly mechanical than passionate and we are always the one who initiate. My entire marriage he kept telling me I'm abnormal for being too sexual or wanting to try different positions, with my husband!
5- They grew up with looking at magazines and perhaps locker rooms, etc. But with the internet revolution in the 90s, they suddenly had access to online chatrooms, pics, etc. Over the years being gay became more acceptable. Now there are gay dating apps. If you just found out about their online profile, it doesn't mean it just started a few months ago. Their medium has been updated. I found out years of craigslist personal emails in my husband's computer. It just becomes easier for us to catch them.
6-  They all deny being gay because they don't want to be gay. They love you, yes. Because you are amazing. Who wouldn't love you. BUT, he loves you for what you provide to him. Don't confuse these two. 

Be kind to yourself. trust your gut. Do whats best for you and your kids. It wasn't your fault to be in this situation, but now its your responsibility to get out of it. Whatever that is for you.

Good luck!