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He Has Decided to Choose Me ????
My divorce was final on January 10, 2019, after 44 years of marriage and discovering TGT 18 months ago. My X remains in his closet. He has gaslighted me, and continues to lie. He cries and he is so scared, he is hoping after a year of living apart we can get back together.....and now this is his new plea.......
He says, " I choose you over my sexuality....I choose you."
The sad truth is a year ago, I would of believed him. But now, I know it is not possible, But how I wish it was true, I wish he could just choose me. If only......
- phoenix
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Re: He Has Decided to Choose Me ????
I'm proud of you for moving forward and knowing confidently that you made the correct decision. Walk forward toward the future you desire.
-Formerly "Lostdad" - I now embrace the username "phoenix" because my former life ended in flames, but my new life will be spectacular.
- Mimi
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Re: He Has Decided to Choose Me ????
Violated,
The fact is you can’t choose between a spouse and your sexuality. They come together in one package. It’s not choosing between two things, one without the other doesn’t make sense. A spouse without sexual relationship is a roommate.
- Rob
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Re: He Has Decided to Choose Me ????
Mimi,
A warm congrats getting away from TGT.
Looking at your statement from an outsider..shows how full of themselves they are.. He chooses you? Gee that's good...werent you /we chosen on our wedding day? What were those words then? Should we bow down and worship them now only to have their decision change tomorrow with the weather? Why did it take a divorce to get chosen ?
Walk on..we are worth so much more..we always were.
"For we walk by faith, not by sight .." 2Corinthians 5:7
- Lynne
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Re: He Has Decided to Choose Me ????
Last edited by Lynne (February 3, 2019 2:08 pm)
- Violated
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Re: He Has Decided to Choose Me ????
Thank you all for your responses. After 14 months of denial, of gas lighting of manipulation of lies, finally Today, he finally admitted in his "code Talk", that he is attracted to "his own equipment." That he is erotically and sexually attracted to men, but could never have an emotional relationship with a man. He has suppressed his same sex attraction for years, but can recall in the high school gym showers getting aroused. We married at 20, then in his 40's he began acting out on his same sex attractions. So basically for 20 years of my 44 years of marriage he has perpetuated a lie.
So finally, I got an admission of the same sex attraction but he can't say the word, "gay,' just admits he's "not straight." This is good enough for me, I got some truth, in a weird way I am relieved but I don't know why. Maybe because I just wanted him to admit it, to just be truthful. This is as truthful as he will get, and I am OK with that.
I am so done with it all. I am just so tired. I just want to clear my mind, get all these porno images out of my mind. I no longer want to be in this muck. He moves out in April,......then hopefully, I can breathe and just have peace. What a crazy ride it has been.
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