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1 of 1- Tyurk
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A gay man hit on him now he is repulsed?
As some of you know already, my husband addicted to tranny porn/dressing up/anal penetration/ ect with which i have struggled with for years as this slowly came out. Went from a porn addiction to admitting he thinks he is bi (over many years).
So anyway, during our separation and his diving down this road of gay discovery and actually talking to a gay person (A person we both know at a party) he claims he is sure he doesn't want to experiment in real life and he realizes it was all just fantasy. That when this gay guy hit on him he felt gross.
Im even more confused. And he wants us to work our marriage out of course because he nows for sure now he doesnt want that lifestyle, he says.
I feel guilty and pressured to stay now.
What do you all think? How would you feel if your spouse said this to you right now, during their discovery?
- Ellexoh_nz
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Re: A gay man hit on him now he is repulsed?
Tyurk wrote:
....What do you all think? How would you feel if your spouse said this to you right now, during their discovery?
I would find it frustrating my partner was wanting to discuss the subject now....after the months of sweeping it under the carpet! (but that's my particular situation)
I may tell him to man up and find a good counselor. I'd also find it extremely hard to believe him
KIA KAHA
- Lena
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Re: A gay man hit on him now he is repulsed?
Tyruk,
I would not believe him. I have been there.
Maybe his head wants too... it is too much on the stake, especially his reputation in the society.
He feels gross, because he does not want to be that person, but his actions say otherwise.
There is not much he can do about his nature.
You will never be sure of him and his love for you. Too much had happened on your end. Can you picture yourself happy with him, and free of doubts?
If you decided to leave, you should keep following your path and think what is best for you.
- Tamiam
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Re: A gay man hit on him now he is repulsed?
Tyurk,
The being repulsed by a gay man hitting on him was a big part of my ex's "straightness" from the very beginning of our friendship. It's why I had no clue, not even an inkling that he was gay. You are right to be skeptical.
- Duped
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Re: A gay man hit on him now he is repulsed?
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Last edited by Duped (August 26, 2019 2:35 pm)
- OutofHisCloset
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Re: A gay man hit on him now he is repulsed?
What would I say? I'd say, Sorry, I'm not your fallback plan B that you run back to when you get cold feet. I'm not your mommy that you seek comfort from when you stick your toe into the water of gay life that you have lusted for and been willing to trash your marriage for and decide it's too intense and scary.
You should feel no guilt at all to take this man back. And even if you do feel guilt, you should be pretty darned wary of the permanence of his "I don't want this!" As others say, it's likely only to be a response to the fear he's feeling. If he's just now reaching out to take his desires out of fantasy, and was in hiding, then a foray into the real world--even talking to a gay person!--is likely to scare the bejesus out of him. So no, I find it unlikely that he's had a re-conversion experience and is straight now.
- Violated
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Re: A gay man hit on him now he is repulsed?
Wondering, it is bullshit and throw in some horseshit, too. You sound strong to me, I know you are still in pain, but, you have accepted your reality. No more excuses. Not sure what the next step is after Acceptance.......but you are one hell of a strong woman!