Ugh, this is such a terrible situation. Sadly for me, he gave me HIV before I found about TGT, and subsequently tried to rationalize that he got it from previous drug use and his sexcapades while on drugs. I didn't know that this would lead me on a sick and turmoiled path for the next 4 years. 

Yes, this sucks, and what he did to you is deplorable. He obviously doesn't give two shits about you or your welfare, or your children. That is a fucked up thing to accept.  However, none of this means that you can't continue to live a good life. You are not stuck with him, and people will want you again. I didn't believe this for years, but am slowly coming to terms with it. I've had 3 men, so far, want to date me, kiss me, and one even slept with me despite my positive HIV status, and of course they knew. Only monsters don't disclose this information to their partners. I haven't pursued any of these relationships because I know I'm not mentally/emotional well or capable enough to enter another relationship. And that's okay, I need time to heal.  

I will also say, it's no one's business that you have herpes, unless you're going to sleep with them. You do NOT owe it to anyone to tell them just because they've taken you on a date or "spent money on you." Men, or anyone else should want to do this for you to spend time with you, not just for the end result of sex. You may not have been able to control getting this disease, but you damn sure have control now of who you tell, and should only do so when you're ready. People are manipulative and hurtful and you shouldn't go telling someone on the first date. It's not their business at this point. Make sure you feel comfortable telling them when YOU are READY. When I first found out all I wanted to do was shout it from the rooftops so I'd feel released from it, so the disease didn't control me. Right or wrong, I'm glad I didn't. Your diagnosis is so so new, and I think these feelings are normal, but I think as you slowly begin to process everything you'll find that you'll begin to react differently and want to guard yourself and your heart more.

One of my bestfriends got herpes from a shitbag boyfriend when she was 19 years old. She's now 37, married a good man, subsequently divorced that man, and has dated numerous people since - ALL knew she had herpes. Like I've said, I've already had suitors, too. All men will not accept your status, but some will. The right ones will and will actually make that effort to be with you despite it.  Don't allow yourself to think no one will ever want you, that type of thinking will just further ruin your self-esteem and self-respect.

Big hugs to you while you're dealing with such a terrible situation, and dealing with a monster who successfully pulled the wool over your eyes for so long. I completely understand your pain, and have been exactly where you are. You will SURVIVE and will THRIVE, it just may take some time.