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1 of 1- tompetty781
- New member
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Sex Life Altered and Awkward
Does anyone have any experience around how awkward your sex life became or still is when your spouse was still trying to figure things out and says she/he is confused. My wife tells me she is attracted to me- we tried to have sex last night only for it to end abruptly and her telling me she is confused inside. This morning she tells me she seems more attracted to women and I am the only man she would want to sleep with. I told her how confusing and hurtful this all is for me. I then think she wants to lay with me and cuddle and at the same time cultivate a relationship with this other woman. What the hell?
- OutofHisCloset
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Re: Sex Life Altered and Awkward
I think that your wife, although confused, is acting in an extremely selfish manner, and not thinking at all about your feelings. The same thing happened to me with my husband, who expected me to empathize with his situation and to comfort him in his trepidation about his future. At the time, I saw his need as a good thing ("He still needs me! He still wants me! If he's asking for my help it means we have a future!). I no longer do. Now I think they're selfish. And because they are, we have to harden up our hearts and become very self protective, because they are thinking only about themselves. Why should you allow yourself to become merely of use to her in an experiment of "am I lesbian or am I straight?" Let her move out, and figure it out on her own, and if she decides she wants to be married to a straight man, come back. My two cents.
- lily
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Re: Sex Life Altered and Awkward
I think there's a sentimental aspect - before she met this woman her sentiments weren't aroused and now they are, it has happened by falling in love with this woman, and so she finds it harder to have sex with you.
sorry to be blunt I know how hurtful this is, but you are asking.
I agree with the other posters that the way she is acting towards you is selfish. It's understandable, she fears change just like the rest of us, but it keeps you dangling on a string - "the only man she would want to sleep with" !?! If she were a heterosexual monogamist this would be good news but what does it mean in context of her love affair with a woman?