He won’t change Cindys, this talking in circles will go on forever. Most of us don’t get the admission, we just have to say that what we see is what is real, not the crap they feed us. None of us deserve the gaslighting and circular conversations, they drive us insane.

Going into this marriage were you the kind of person to say that you could put up with being married to a gay man? Or has he succeeded in wearing you down that far.

Last edited by Duped (April 9, 2018 1:25 pm)

>Still Wondering:
 He is still dating women.  He is still 100% denying. 
     Exactly. Women are the denial 'Womb' that they return to over and over again. (While they continue to have sex with men.) It doesn't change. 
>Cindys:
1. I know how hard it is to accept that the person we were closest to and spent most of our lives living with was/is a fraud.
2.  Normal people who are gay do not use other people like our spouses did/do

  1. Not in their head...they are doing what is the norm and what for most want in normal society. Reread some of Seans post. They do out of denial.
  2. Those who are out usually don't. It may take years to come to this conclusion for them.
But for most that are in denial...they will drag others along the way through their own personal mud.

From my/others personal experience, opinion, research and I could go on and on....
To me there is only one difference between=
   1. A Gay MAN (out that is)
   2. A Bi-sexual Man (maybe out, maybe not) and a 
   3. A "straight man" who sometimes has sex other 'men' 

It's this (and only a theory but one I think you can take to the bank..)

   > The gay Man is finally out and open to the world and admits that, "After a long journey, they have finally reached their destination." 

The other two are right behind him.
Yet at different levels in the road...They will get there.
They ALWAYS do.

I'll post more on this later but the bottom line is..They are gay or will get there in time.
It's hopeless for women that are in these relationships since the "Ship" has sunk and they crossed the line.
There's no saving them.
Or us as long as we are tied to them.
             
















 

Last edited by Scrupulous (April 9, 2018 6:30 pm)

I think my ex came out to me only because he had found a man with whom he was head-over-heels in love. My ex wanted an emotional connection with a man and I think for him the sexual connection was secondary. For those whose spouses just want hookups and with multiple anonymous partners there may never be an admission because there is no emotional connection. Falling in love shakes the truth out of the first category but the truth for the second only comes out when they get caught literally with their pants down - arrested for indecent exposure or as a corpse when they were set up for robbery and it went awry.

There was a period in my marriage when I repeatedly asked God why my husband was so cold to me. One day as I was driving to work asking this as-yet-unanswered question a truck passed me with the bumper sticker "SHIT HAPPENS". I took that as His answer: I did not need to know the why but only to recognize it for what it was.

What do you do when you are out walking and are confronted with a pile of shit? You don't worry about its origins but you make sure you don't step into it (engagement). You walk around it (avoidance) and you keep an eye out for more (awareness). You do these same three things over and over as you continue on your way.

To add to that revelation some twenty years later, at some point you may decide that keeping your head down watching for shit is distracting you from what you set out to see on your walk and conclude that you are walking in a dog park. At that point you may head off to a garden where dogs aren't allowed.

I hope I haven't too badly offended dog lovers and the devout and that maybe it will help someone else find clarity.

 

Me too...although I clear up my dog mess so anyone can walk near me and not have to put up with any shit ;-) unlike these crappy men.

Exactly Abby. Who cares where the shit starts?
But because we are caring women that want to fix everything and love them, we look for answers of hope.
I just want to know where I'm walking to avoid the shit again. 
Becauses he's a shit. LOL