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Sat Jul 1 4:42 am  #1


After 32 years....

  Everytime I log on to SSOForum...every single time.....and read....well anthing really, I end up crying. This 
site has become so painful, I guess because as someone here said once..."she's in a holding pattern" and I'm 
fighting what seems to be from reading this forum....the inevitable demise of the r'ship, life and love I'm told will happen someday
At least I've stopped trying to understand what's happened to him...
but how can I UNlove the man I expected to spend the rest of my life with

  ##Secrets are the relationship killer 

This morning I told the man I thought I knew "I've had enough" 
I contacted my son and said I needed him here, that everybody is okay but I needed 
to see him. I have to tell the ones I care about the most....our son and daughter

This is so fucking hard

"
 I would suggest you have a think about what you consider ‘happy’ because the slow creep erodes your esteem and we end up thinking if we’re not wailing we’re happy. I know happy, I’ve been happy and that doesn’t include tormenting myself and reaching out for support in places like this. I only say all of this because I care, I don’t want to be harsh. Typing this stuff helps me too." 


**..... frustrating, humiliating, maddening and soul crushing.  And all the while, you wish that the pain of what you know can go away.....**

        



 

Last edited by Ellexoh (Sun Oct 15 8:40 pm)


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