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March 24, 2017 4:15 pm  #41


Re: Back and Forth, about to make myself crazy..........er

"..I am entering the world of trying to coparent, with an unstable ex.".

Yeah, my ex is pretty stable though  with herself and the kids..  just evil and mean to me.   We're strictly business.about the kids.  I have no other use for her.

I would say if you could just get your ex to hang with the kids so you could get a break?   Maybe pick the kids up or take them where they need to be..   find some use for him.

Otherwise  no contact.   We're essentially part time single parents now...you it  sounds like more full time.   They will always be there...like you I'm trying to adjust.    Some days are ok, some days bad.   I plan on some mental health days starting right about now.
 

Last edited by Rob (March 24, 2017 4:26 pm)


"For we walk by faith, not by sight .."  2Corinthians 5:7
 

March 26, 2017 5:19 pm  #42


Re: Back and Forth, about to make myself crazy..........er

Those who are still parenting, just keep in mind, once your youngest child is fully grown then the only other thing the ex-gay spouse will be involved in will be your children's marriage ceremony. There will be light at the end of the tunnel. So always keep that day in the back of your minds, while all of you still have to deal with them. Trust me, the day will come. A week after my son's 18th I celebrated and rewarded myself. I went shopping and bought myself an expensive gift. Yahoo! no more ex to deal with! I thought I'm going to do this because 1. I deserve it and 2. I desired it. 3. Then I went for it. Why not, no more husband telling me no. 

 

March 26, 2017 6:51 pm  #43


Re: Back and Forth, about to make myself crazy..........er

Trust me, JK, I know the feeling. When my son moved out to move in with his gf/now his wife. I cried for hours after helping him load his car and waved goodbye to him. Seeing your kids go off to college and then marry and move away for good is one of the hardest things a loving mother will ever feel. The empty nest syndrome hit me hard. I went up to his now mostly empty room and cried like a baby for hours, nearly two weeks. 

I just remember feeling...I never have to deal with that a**shole (his GID, Bi-father) ever again. I was on cloud nine and nothing was going to take that away from me, nothing. It was finally over, the legal stuff anyway!! At least my son had my father, his strong, funny on-liner grandpa to be an example for him. I'm so very thankful for that. 

Even through the horrendous hardships with his dad, our son turned out just fine, so in the end, I'm at peace with walking away and giving my son the life he deserved. A safe, happy, home, which turned him into a fine loving husband and father himself. I'm very proud of him. 

Last edited by Emerald (March 26, 2017 6:54 pm)

 

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