Welcome to this board and the club that none of us wanted to join. I cannot tell you if this will work. My situation is that as we were approaching retirement my husband decided to come out of the closet, told me that he was gay, and wanted a divorce. Our children were adults. I concluded I did not want to bargain to try to change his mind and we divorced.

There are women here who are, or have been, in your situation and they likely will respond later. The one piece of advice I can offer is to know what your rights will be if you decide that this is not for you and you want a divorce. You are married and he has obligations to you and his child, Knowing the law and how it works is empowering.

Think about your personal resources too. Do you have friends or family who will be supportive if you decide to leave? Do you have the ability to get a therapist for yourself if you think that would help you work your way through what this change means for you and what your needs are?.
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Breathe. You are at the beginning of a journey..

Last edited by Abby (January 19, 2024 10:03 am)

I’m also in the same boat. My husband let me know three months ago that he was questioning his gender. We’ve been together almost 19 years and have two teenage kids. At first he said that he just wanted to be a little bit more feminine, and in the last three months has started to experiment with make up,clothing, etc. I want him to be happy but it’s also been a daily struggle for me. We’ve decided that he’s going to move out for six months to explore what this really means and how far he wants to take it. Everything is so up in the air with no clear answers of what is going to happen , which leaves me feeling so anxious every day. We are going to tell our kids next week and the thought of that is almost too overwhelming.